By David Evjen

T

Bitman

By David Evjen

[e-mail]
Wednesday,

November 12th, 2014

HE BITS…
Kim Kardashian has posed for the cover of a new magazine while balancing a champagne glass on her butt. Of course, if she really wanted to, Kim could balance an entire liquor store on her butt.
Kim Kardashian has posed for a magazine cover while balancing a champagne glass on her butt. Let’s just hope it was the champagne causing the bubbles.
Britney Spears made her new boyfriend Charlie Ebersol sign a confidentiality agreement before they had their first lunch date. After signing, they had a scrumptious lunch of pheasant under gag order.
The Osbournes are returning to MTV next year because Ozzy wished he could go back and do the show while he’s clean and sober. Unfortunately, if Ozzy had done the show while clean and sober, nobody would’ve watched.
Randy Jackson is leaving American Idol this season. Jackson apparently failed to convince the other judges to use their one save.
According to a new book, Jesus was married to Mary Magdalene and they had two children. However, Biblical scholars are skeptical about the book’s claim that Jesus and his family had a wacky next door neighbor.
According to a new book, Jesus was married to Mary Magdalene and they had two children. The book also claims Jesus and Mary had a huge fight when he wouldn’t take her to the Last Supper.
The U.S. and China have announced a major new global warming deal. People in Minnesota are hoping they can make it warm up right away.

S

Bitman

By David Evjen

[e-mail]
Wednesday,

November 12th, 2014

ON OF THE BITS…
During the economic summit in China, Russian President Vladimir Putin offended the Chinese by wrapping a shawl around the wife of Chinese President Xi Jinping to keep her warm. Rumor has it that Putin is now plotting to invade her.
McDonald's is recalling a Hello Kitty whistle from their Happy Meals because it could cause children to choke. Still, they say the whistle is easier to swallow than the Happy Meal.
A guy claims he heard something clanking in his soda can and uploaded a video to YouTube in which he opens the can and pours out a rusty bolt. The guy was really upset because he was hoping for a dead rat.
It’s reported that those laundry detergent pods send an average of one young child a day to hospitals. That’s terrible. How come I can’t get my kids to do the laundry?
It’s reported that those laundry detergent pods send an average of one young child a day to hospitals. On the upside, doctors say the kids arrive smelling fresh.
Researchers now say that the more money you spend on a wedding, the higher chance you have of getting divorced. Researchers came to the conclusion after watching Keeping Up with the Kardashians.
Thanks to celebrities like Kim Kardashian, Jennifer Lopez and Nicki Minaj, many women now want to have large butts. That means, for guys, when their women ask if their dresses make their butts look big, the correct answer is ‘yes.’
Thanks to celebrities like Kim Kardashian, Jennifer Lopez and Nicki Minaj, many women now want large butts. Some women are achieving larger butts through exercise; some are doing it through surgery, while others are using Ben & Jerry’s.

T

Bitman

By David Evjen

[e-mail]
Wednesday,

November 12th, 2014

ODAY’S BITMAN AUDIO…
Today on the Bitman audio feed we have clips from Sons of Anarchy, Master Chef, Dancing with the Stars and Master Chef, plus a late night round up with Dave, The Jimmys, Craig, Seth and Conan.
It’s all at www.BitmanComedy.com
Not hearing anything? TV Sound bites are available at BitmanComedy.com! If you need access to the site, contact Adrienne Munos at United Stations Radio Network at 561-381-7598 or [e-mail]

 

T

Bitman

By David Evjen

[e-mail]
Wednesday,

November 12th, 2014

INSELTOWN TATTLER…
KHLOE KARDASHIAN ticked off a lot of people when she posted a joke about the KKK on her Instagram last night. Khloe posted a photo of herself with sisters Kim and Kourtney that read, “The only KKK to let black men in.” Ebony Senior Digital Editor Jamilah Lemieux tweeted, “Wow Khloe Kardashian, you are a trash bag.” Other twitter responses included, “IDK maybe it’s just me, but if I were attracted to and slept with and married black men, I might not make KKK jokes” and “If you’re a white woman (ahem Khloe) who’s dated or married a black man, one would assume you’d get why a KKK joke isn’t even remotely funny.”
STEPHEN COLLINS and his estranged wife, Faye Grant, are heading to court today to divide up their assets and it has the potential to get ugly. Grant secretly recorded Collins confessing to molesting young girls decades ago and wants a bunch of their assets after more than 25 years of marriage. However, Collins is at least trying to deny her spousal support since that leaked tape has pretty much ruined his career and he has little hope of any significant income again.
HERE COMES HONEY BOO BOO’S Anna “Chickadee” Cardwell is now saying that Mama June’s sex offender boyfriend is the father of her other daughter, Lauryn “Pumpkin” Thompson. Chickadee told Dr. Drew on HLN that’s one of the main reasons Pumpkin defended her mother when the news first broke that she was back with Mark McDaniel. Pumpkin’s defense of Mama June raised eyebrows at the time, but Chickadee added that Mama doesn’t know who Pumpkin’s father is. Of course, Chickadee and Pumpkin don’t get along, so this could be sour grapes.
Like all of her men, BRITNEY SPEARS made new boyfriend Charlie Ebersol sign a confidentiality agreement, meaning he can’t blab to the press about anything that goes on between them or in her life. The surprising thing is that he had to sign even before their first date, which was just for lunch. However, being in the entertainment biz, Charlie knew the drill, so he had no problem with signing.

T

Bitman

By David Evjen

[e-mail]
Wednesday,

November 12th, 2014

INSELTOWN TATTLER 2…
It turns out that AMANDA BYNES’ parents didn’t leave her quite as high and dry as it seemed. Word is they got her a room at a Glendale hotel, along with car service and food, immediately after she was released from the psychiatric facility. The problem is that Amanda didn’t want to be in boring old Glendale, while her parents didn’t want her anywhere near Hollywood where she could easily get in trouble. However, that’s where Amanda wants to be, so she turned down the hotel.
KENDRA WILKINSON’S people are denying reports that she finally dumped husband HANK BASKETT after he allegedly had an affair with transsexual model. Rumors of a split started when Kendra told Dish Nation, "I'm single for the time being." It turns out that she’s gone to Australia alone to do the reality show "I'm a Celebrity...Get Me Out of Here!" They say it was either a misunderstanding or just something to drum up publicity for the show.
Former Spice Girl GERI HALLIWELL is engaged to Formula 1 racing team boss Christian Horner. Like Benedict Cumberbatch, the couple placed a simple announcement in The London Times. This will be the first marriage for Halliwell, who has an 8-year-old daughter from a previous relationship, while Christian has a 1-year-old daughter, also from his previous relationship.
MARC ANTHONY tied the knot with Venezuelan model Shannon De Lima in front of close friends and family in the Dominican Republic. They exchanged vows at a private home at the Casa de Campo resort.
JEFF GOLDBLUM married for a third time on Saturday. Goldblum tied the knot with Emilie Livingston after more than three years of dating. The couple married in front of friends and family at L.A.'s Chateau Marmont. Goldblum was previously married to his Silverado co-star Patricia Gaul from 1980 to 1986, and to his Earth Girls Are Easy co-star Geena Davis from 1987 to 1990.
T

Bitman

By David Evjen

[e-mail]
Wednesday,

November 12th, 2014

INSELTOWN TATTLER 3…
Paper magazine had a goal to break the Internet and so for their Winter issue they put KIM KARDASHIAN on the cover in a black dress balancing a champagne glass on her butt. In another photo, Kim pulls down the dress to reveal her behemoth backside. Kim also tweeted: "And they say I didn't have a talent...try balancing a champagne glass on your ass." (See here)
Now they’re saying it wasn’t an overdose of Propofol that led to JOAN RIVERS’ death, but lack of proper medical equipment and inattentiveness on the part of the medical clinic staff. They say doctors somehow failed to notice that Joan was in distress. The Rivers’ family’s legal team believes Joan's vocal chords closed shut and cut off her oxygen. Had doctors noticed this and if they had a drug called Succinylcholine on hand, it would’ve instantly opened her breathing passage.
There’s more evidence that ROBIN WILLIAMS' suicide was triggered by a disease called Lewy Body Dementia, in which protein deposits in the brain disrupt its normal function. Medications for the disease often cause hallucinations and Robin's wife had told authorities shortly after his death that he’d been complaining about the drugs and the way they made him feel. It’s also reported that Williams left his $50 million estate to his three children.
BRET MICHAELS is having more health issues as he’s been rushed to the hospital six times in two weeks while on tour with his band. Two stents were placed in Michaels’ body last week and he returned to the stage shortly after, against doctors' wishes. Immediately following the show, he was hospitalized for a short while again, and then headed to his next performance. A bandmate says, “Jumping around with two stents was a bad idea. I can't explain the amount of blood or where it came from, but it was horrifying on his bus after the show.” Michaels is currently recovering from kidney surgery and this time doctors are refusing to release him until he gets better.

D

Bitman

By David Evjen

[e-mail]
Wednesday,

November 12th, 2014

ATELINE HOLLYWOOD…
For the first time in the show’s history, RANDY JACKSON won’t be a part of AMERICAN IDOL this season. Jackson is moving on again after previously leaving the show in May 2013, but returning three months later as a mentor.
THE OSBOURNES are returning to MTV next year! Sharon Osbourne says there’ll be only be six to eight episodes just so everyone can catch up with what the family has been up to since the show went off the air.
Newlyweds DONNIE WAHLBERG and JENNY MCCARTHY are going to do their own reality show. Donnie Loves Jenny will be a 10-episode series for A&E that’ll premiere in 2015 with a one-hour special about their recent wedding.
The names of some of BARBARA WALTERS' annual list of 10 Most Fascinating People are out. Among them are Taylor Swift, Oprah Winfrey, Neil Patrick Harris, Chelsea Handler, and Scarlett Johansson. The special airs December 14th.
TNT has canceled the Mark-Paul Gosselaar and Breckin Meyer legal drama FRANKLIN & BASH after four seasons.
Fox News host MEGYN KELLY had an embarrassing flub this week when she introduced guest Mike Huckabee, but ended up dropping an F-bomb! (See here)
PAT SAJAK gave up on his WHEEL OF FORTUNE contestants the other night and finally walked off the set. (See here)
THE BIG BANG THEORY’S CAROL ANN SUSI has died after a brief battle with cancer at the age of 62. She played Howard's mother, Mrs. Wolowitz, and while her face was never her voice was instantly recognizable.

M

Bitman

By David Evjen

[e-mail]
Wednesday,

November 12th, 2014

USIC NOTES…
From the ‘tell us how you really feel’ file…FOO FIGHTERS' TAYLOR HAWKINS described U2's new album, Songs of Innocence, by saying, "It just kinda sounds like a fart any way you listen to it."
The coroner’s report is in on SURVIVOR lead singer JIMI JAMISON and it shows he had a narrowing of his arteries and cardiovascular disease, which ultimately led to a fatal stroke. The report also noted methamphetamine abuse. Jamison died back in September at his home in Memphis.
Spotify CEO Daniel Ek has responded to TAYLOR SWIFT after she pulled her music from the site. Ek says that unlike the illegal download services, Spotify does pay the artists for every time their songs are streamed and that Taylor was on track to make $6 million from the site this year.
Video has surfaced showing TAYLOR SWIFT performing the national anthem at a Philadelphia 76ers game when she was just 12-year-old! (See here)
Producer Rodney “Darkchild” Jerkins has announced he’s planning to re-record Brandy and Monica’s classic ‘The Boy is Mine,’ this time with ARIANA GRANDE and JESSIE J.
After roughing up numerous photographers, JUSTIN BIEBER has been training with Floyd Mayweather Jr., who now says the Biebs could go pro in the boxing ring if he wanted to. (See here)
Los Angeles taxpayers may be on the hook for $170,000 in expenses from JAY Z'S Made in America music festival this past summer. However, Mayor Eric Garcetti said the event provided a benefit to the city that exceeded any extra costs.

M

Bitman

By David Evjen

[e-mail]
Wednesday,

November 12th, 2014

USIC NOTES 2…
NICKI MINAJ apologized on Twitter yesterday for the Nazi imagery in her lyric video for "Only." Nicki says it was actually inspired by a cartoon called Metalocalypse & Sin City and that she was very sorry and took full responsibility if it offended anyone. However, the video’s director Jeff Osborne isn’t apologizing and noted a majority of the recognizable symbols are American and that he thinks it’s important to remind younger generations of atrocities that occurred in the past.
EMINEM has released a rap to promote a new compilation album from his label, Shady Records.  However, a lot of people have a problem with it because he raps: “Bitch I’ll punch Lana Del Rey right in the face twice, like Ray Rice in broad daylight in the plain sight of the elevator surveillance/’Til her head is banging on the railing, then celebrate with the Ravens.” (See here)
SUGARHILL GANG rapper Big Bank Hank, whose real name is Henry Jackson, has died at the age of 57. Jackson had been battling cancer.
KEITH URBAN will return to HSN this Saturday evening to introduce his new "Night Star" guitar collection. The limited-edition line will be available for $289.95 for one day only. It also includes an instructional DVD from Keith.
LUKE BRYAN leads the way with seven nominations for the new American Country Countdown Awards. Right behind are FLORIDA GEORGIA LINE with six nominations. The show will air live on Monday, December 15th on Fox.
GARTH BROOKS joined the social media world yesterday by launching his official Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram pages. Garth uploaded video messages to fans, and posted his first official selfie.  
KENNY CHESNEY is adding JAKE OWEN, COLE SWINDELL, and CHASE RICE to select dates of his Big Revival Tour. Kenny promises more news soon.  

T

Bitman

By David Evjen

[e-mail]
Wednesday,

November 12th, 2014

UBULAR…

Daytime:

GMA: Donald Sutherland; actor Steve Carell; Fifth Harmony performs

Today: Dionne Warwick and Ruben Studdard perform

Kelly & Michael: Aretha Franklin performs

The View: Guest co-host Ashanti

The Talk: Nikki Yanofsky performs

Ellen: Sofia Vergara; guest DJ Nick Jonas performs
Primetime:

CBS: On Survivor, after exiling one of their own, the castaways enjoy a taco bar

Fox: Hell’s Kitchen cooks serve music legends, including Stewart Copeland and Steven Tyler

NBC: The Voice voting determines which two performers from each team will advance to the next round; plus Law & Order SVU and Chicago PD pick up the story from last night’s Chicago Fire.

ESPN: NBA Pacers at Heat and Rockets vs Timberwolves

ESPN2: College football Kent State at Bowling Green

NBC Sports: Hockey with the Bruins at Maple Leafs and Kings at Ducks
Late Night:

Jimmy Kimmel: Mike Myers; Tears for Fears performs

David Letterman: Actress Jennifer Lawrence

Jimmy Fallon: Channing Tatum; Logic performs with The Roots

Craig Ferguson: Comic Steven Wright

Seth Meyers: Ex Hex performs

Conan: Actress Jessica Chastain

T

Bitman

By David Evjen

[e-mail]
Friday,

May 29th, 2009

Bitman

By David Evjen

[e-mail]
Wednesday,

November 12th, 2014

HE WATERCOOLER…
Black Friday is still a couple of weeks away, but Target and Best Buy have released their full Black Friday catalog on their websites so you can see what sort of deals you can cash in on. Best Buy is offering a 50-inch Panasonic LED HDTV for just $199.99 while Target is offering a 39-inch Vizio LED HDTV at $219.99. Both stores are also offering deep discounts on Beats headphones, Fitbit fitness trackers, iPads, Blu-rays and video games. If you don’t want to wait until Black Friday, Best Buy will open its doors at 5 PM on Thanksgiving and Target will follow an hour later.
Flying into space aboard the Virgin Galactic Spaceship Two seemed like a cool idea until that recent test crash. Some 700 people have purchased or reserved tickets for a flight, which initially cost $200,000 but later jumped to $250,000. However, since the crash, a company spokesperson said that about 20 people have requested refunds. Celebrities who’ve reserved flights include Justin Bieber, Leonardo DiCaprio, Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt, Lady Gaga and Ashton Kutcher, although it’s not known if any of them have canceled.
Dayton, Ohio mother Nicole Allen said she was shocked to discover the "princess wand" she bought for her daughter from a dollar store this week contained an image of a girl cutting her wrist. Nicole said that when a piece of foil came off it revealed a creepy picture of a girl cutting her wrist with a knife and that the wand also featured flashing lights and an evil cackling sound effect. However, store owner Amar Moustafa said Nicole should’ve known what she was getting as the product, despite having a princess on its packaging, is called an "Evil Stick." (See creepy picture here)

T

Bitman

By David Evjen

[e-mail]
Friday,

May 29th, 2009

Bitman

By David Evjen

[e-mail]
Wednesday,

November 12th, 2014

HE WATERCOOLER 2…
Thanks to celebrities like Kim Kardashian, Jennifer Lopez and Nicki Minaj, many women now want to have humongous hineys. To achieve this, women are signing up for gym classes that promise plump posteriors or opting for surgery that pumps fat into the buttocks for gargantuan glutes. The Brazilian butt lift, in which fat is sucked from a patient's stomach, love handles or back, and put into their buttocks and hips, was the fastest-growing plastic surgery procedure last year, with more than 11,000 operations being done. The downside is that it can cost $10,000 to $13,000. Even worse, if you try and do it on the cheap, it can cost even more for a qualified cosmetic surgeon to fix it. There are also reports of women dying after they’ve gone to phony doctors for silicone injections. However, for just $22 you can get Booty Pop padded panties. They report sales are up 47 percent in the last six months. Booty Pop says customers have been clamoring for even larger sizes, so they plan to begin selling pads that are 25 percent larger this month. A spokesperson says, "People just want more booty."
According to new research from Emory University, the bigger the age gap in a marriage, the more likely it is that a couple won't last. The scary thing for couples is that as little as one year can make a difference. They found that couples with a 5-year gap in age are 18 percent more likely to divorce, and those with a 30-year gap in age are a whopping 172 percent more likely to divorce. But even just being one year apart puts you at a 3 percent higher divorce rate. On the other hand, they found that if you stick it out, you have a better chance of staying together as they found couples that have been together five years are 76 percent less likely to split. They also discovered that spending more money on the wedding was associated with a higher chance of divorce, while the more guests that attended, the lower the odds. Couples that regularly attended church were also more likely to stay together


S

Bitman

By David Evjen

[e-mail]
Wednesday,

November 12th, 2014

PORTS SHIRT…
Kobe Bryant set a new NBA record last night for most missed field goals of all time. He racked up the 13,418th miss of his career during the fourth quarter against Memphis, breaking John Havlicek’s old record. (See here)
Upon further review, LeBron James didn’t get a triple-double the other night. The NBA looked at the tapes and took away a rebound and an assist, leaving LeBron with 32 points, 11 rebounds and nine assists.
The Minnesota Vikings’ Adrian Peterson will have his grievance against the NFL heard early next week. The hearing likely will take place Monday but could be pushed to Tuesday at a location to be determined.
San Francisco 49ers linebacker Patrick Willis is out for the remainder of the season due to a strained muscle in his left big toe that will require surgery.
Seattle Seahawks nose tackle Brandon Mebane is out for the season with a hamstring injury. The Seahawks have signed tight end RaShaun Allen from the Minnesota Vikings' practice squad to fill his roster spot.
The Washington Nationals’ Matt Williams has been named 2014 National League Manager of the Year over Clint Hurdle of the Pirates and The San Francisco Giants’ Bruce Bochy.
Baltimore Orioles skipper Buck Showalter was named the American League Manager of the Year. This is Showalter's third Manager of the Year award and he becomes the sixth manager to win it three or more times.
Oregon jumped from No. 4 to No. 2 in the newest College Football Playoff survey. Mississippi State remained No. 1, with Florida State and TCU locking down the other two spots.



Bitman

By David Evjen

[e-mail]
Wednesday,

November 12th, 2014

Scoreboard

NBA:

Toronto 104  Orlando 100  Final

Memphis 107  L.A. Lakers 102  Final

Milwaukee 85  Oklahoma City 78  Final

Dallas 106  Sacramento 98  Final

Portland 102  Charlotte 100  Final

San Antonio 113  Golden State 100  Final
NHL:

New Jersey 3  Minnesota 1  Final

N.Y. Islanders 6  Colorado 0  Final

N.Y. Rangers 5  Pittsburgh 0  Final

Washington 4  Columbus 2  Final

Montreal 3  Winnipeg 0  Final

Florida 4  San Jose 1  Final

St. Louis 6  Buffalo 1  Final

Nashville 3  Edmonton 2  Final

Chicago 3  Tampa Bay 2  Final SO

Dallas 4  Arizona 3  Final

Vancouver 4  Ottawa 3  Final OT


Today’s Games

NBA:

Detroit  at  Washington (7:00 PM)

Utah  at  Atlanta (7:30 PM)

Oklahoma City  at  Boston (7:30 PM)

Indiana  at  Miami (7:30 PM)

Orlando  at  New York (7:30 PM)

L.A. Lakers  at  New Orleans (8:00 PM)

Portland  at  Denver (9:00 PM)

Brooklyn  at  Phoenix (9:00 PM)

Houston  at  Minnesota (10:00 PM)
NHL:

Boston  at  Toronto (8:00 PM)

Los Angeles  at  Anaheim (10:30 PM)

D

Bitman

By David Evjen

[e-mail]
Wednesday,

November 12th, 2014

UH…
The Utah County Sheriff's Office received a series of 911 calls from a cell phone Saturday night, but nobody was speaking on the other end. Even though the phone hadn't been activated, it still had the ability to make emergency calls and be tracked via GPS. Deputies did just that and found 68-year-old John Richard Valenzuela threatening a teenage girl with a loaded rifle. John was arrested on numerous charges, including intoxication, and if you’re wondering why he was so upset with the girl, it seems they’d gotten into an argument over the board game "Battleship."
Police in Oslo, Norway received several emergency calls on Monday evening after people heard screams coming from an apartment. Officers who responded to the call were shocked at what they found. It seems that the screams had come from a lone male chess player who had become frustrated because he kept losing to his own computer.
The family of South Daytona, Florida’s 33-year-old Jason Ferguson found him on his knees by a dishwasher he was installing. After determining he wasn’t praying to the Maytag repairman and was not moving, they called police. Officers attempted CPR, but it turned out to be a case of ‘til death do us part’ as it was determined Jason was leaning on the dishwasher's metal door and his wedding ring touched an element in the back that caused his electrocution.
It would make sense that if you were to risk prison time by making counterfeit money, you’d want a high reward factor. Apparently not doing the math was Kittanning, Pennsylvania’s Gregory Louis Douglas, who allegedly manufactured his own $20 bills and then tried to pass them off at a yard sale. However, Gregory’s plot was unraveled by fate when he chose to pass his funny money at a yard sale being run by experienced bank teller Amy Miller. She later discovered the bogus bucks and notified police. Several days later, during a routine traffic stop, police found uncut sheets of counterfeit $20 bills and counterfeiting supplies in Gregory’s car and he was later arrested.

M

Bitman

By David Evjen

[e-mail]
Wednesday,

November 12th, 2014

O’ DUH…
Philadelphia police are seeking 49-year-old John Kramer on charges including reckless endangerment after he allegedly intentionally drove a Corvette into the Delaware River. Why would police suspect that Kramer would do such a thing? It seems that the car belongs to his estranged wife, with whom he’s currently engaging in a divorce battle and before the incident had threatened to destroy it. Philadelphia Police Chief Inspector Joe Sullivan said, "It's just completely unacceptable immature behavior."
Debbi Wood has been called the most jealous woman in Britain. The 31-year-old Debbi has a delusional disorder known as Othello syndrome. The good news is that Debbi finally found her Othello in husband Steve Wood, who was willing to marry her despite her suspicious nature. Debbi even changed her last name to his before they got married on Halloween. In order to keep tabs on her man, Debbi not only routinely goes through his phone, email and bank statements, she installed filters on his laptop and forces him to take a lie detector test every time he returns house in case he'd been unfaithful.
Knowing it would be the last 90 degree weather for a while in Weatherford, Texas, 69-year-old Mayford K. Davis found a secluded place to sunbathe and alleviate his D deficiency. Davis thought Tison Middle School would be a good place for this activity since he’d never seen anyone there on Sundays. Unfortunately, Davis went for an all over tan and when someone called police about a naked sunbather, officers arrived to find him pulling up his shorts, Davis would’ve been better off just taking some vitamin D supplements as he was cited for indecent exposure.
Melbourne, Florida’s 32-year-old Steven Torres was arrested after allegedly offering to pay an undercover female police officer for certain intimate relations. While Steven can be accused of a lot of things, being a big spender is not one of them. According to the police report, Steven offered the undercover cop $3 and a chicken dinner in exchange for the aforementioned services.

H

Bitman

By David Evjen

[e-mail]
Wednesday,

November 12th, 2014

ISTORY LESSON…
1799: The first North American meteor shower on record took place as astronomer Andrew Ellicott Douglass said, "The whole heaven appeared as if illuminated with sky rockets."

1892: The first professional football game was played in Pittsburgh with the Allegheny Athletic Association defeating the Pittsburgh Athletic Club, 4-0. Touchdowns at the time were worth 4 points.

1920: Judge Kenesaw Mountain Landis was elected baseball's first commissioner

1931: Maple Leaf Gardens opened in Toronto

1940: Walt Disney released Fantasia

1942: The World War II naval Battle of Guadalcanal began

1946: The first drive-up banking facility opened at the Exchange National Bank in Chicago

1954: New York's Ellis Island Immigration Center closed

1970: The Doors played their last concert with Jim Morrison

1993: Michael Jackson canceled a world tour, saying that he had a dependence on painkillers.

Birthday Partiers:
mass murderer Charles Manson 80

singer Brian Hyland 71

musician Booker T. Jones (Booker T and the MG's) 70

sportscaster Al Michaels 70

musician Neil Young 69

actress Megan Mullally (Will & Grace, Stealing Harvard, Monkeybone) 56

actor David Schwimmer (Friends, Kissing A Fool, Apt Pupil) 48

actor Ryan Gosling (The Notebook, Remember The Titans, Drive) 34

actress Anne Hathaway (The Devil Wears Prada, Brokeback Mountain, Les Misérables) 32