Chosen Islamic Manners

*The physical method of giving Salam is by handshaking, hugging, and kissing.

Handshaking: Abu Dawood narrated that the Messenger of Allah () said:

No two Muslims who meet each other and shake each other’s hands, except that their sins will be forgiven before they depart from that meeting.

Anas () reported that the Prophet () was asked:

'O Messenger of Allah! When one of us meets his friend should he bow down slightly to him? The Prophet () said: 'no.' he was then asked: 'should he kiss him?' He said: 'no.' He then was asked: 'Should he shake his hand?' He said: 'yes, if he wishes.' (Tirmidthi)

Anas () also narrated that the Prophet () would not remove his hand from the person who shook his hand until he would remove his hand.

Hugging: Some state that hugging is specific to traveling. Some scholars have stated that hugging is appropriate if someone has been absent for a long period of time or if the person is a man of honor and stature in the community. They used as proof what was narrated in Tirmidthi, that the Messenger of Allah () went to the house of Abu at-Taihan, who was a Companion, and when he recognized him, he hugged the Messenger (). His house was in Madinah.'
Kissing: The scholars mentioned that one may kiss the other's head, as for kissing the hands many Scholars disliked it. Sheik Islam b. Taymiyyah, may Allah have mercy on him, stated that some jurists dubbed kissing the hand as the ‘lesser sujood (prostration)’. Kissing someone's face, cheeks or lips is prohibited and the prohibition becomes more intense if one is sexually moved.

Some Scholars legalized kissing the hands of the pious, and hands of the scholars out of respect for them. In general, it is unpraisesworthy for one to kiss anyone else's hand. One should avoid kissing the hand of a beautiful young boy. It is mentioned in the fatawa (legal verdicts) of Imam an-Nawawi, may Allah have mercy on him: If someone wants to kiss anyone else's hand on account of that person's ascetic behavior it is not blameworthy, for Abu Ubaidah () kissed the hand of Umar (). If one kisses another's hand due to that individual's wealth and influence than it is highly unpraiseworthy.

*During the Prophet’s life time and the period of the Rightly Guided Caliphs³², no one would stand up when greeting the other with Salam as many are accustomed to doing today. Anas () said there was no individual more revered by the Companions than the Prophet (); yet, they would not stand up when they saw him, because they knew he disliked that.

On some occasions they would get up to greet one who returned from a trip. It is narrated that the Prophet () stood up to greet Ikrimah ().

He also got up to greet Sa'd b. Mu'aadth () and said to the Ansar (): 'Stand up to greet your master',³³ when he came forward to judge in the case of Bani Quraidthah.

If the customary practice among a people is to stand up and greet an individual and not doing so is a dishonoring act, then one should stand up and greet that individual for this will safeguard one from harboring hatred against his brothers.

If a person knows that the people who live in an area love to follow the Sunnah, then one should not stand up, for no harm will result, by the will of Allah.
*It is praiseworthy for the one who cannot give the Salam for a valid reason to explain why he did not give it. Jabir () said that the Prophet () sent him to do a chore for him. He then said: 'I came to him, and gave him Salam but he did not respond to me and I felt bad. I thought, maybe he has something against me, so I gave him Salam again, and he did not respond to me and I felt worse. I then gave him Salam for the third time and he responded to me. He said: