Defining Moments

ONE VOICE- THE START OF A VIDEO PODCAST SERIES.

A few days later, I began to reflect upon what I was told at the retail store. I kept going over in my head what the clerk had told me, when I was trying to buy a monkey for Danielle. I started to become angry because it was not right to be treated like that. I am going to have a family and I needed to make a statement against such hatred. The question of the day lied in what could I do. I wanted to give a personal insight into what I had experienced so others would know the truth. The time came to take my voice into action and I decided to create a video on my cell phone and upload it to Youtube.com. I called it ONE VOICE.

“It only takes one to make a difference”

On the cold morning of September 21^st, 2011 I launched ONE VOICE. You can find the original podcast launching ONE VOICE at

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NDJkbYPdPYo

I went on to create ONE VOICE: Stepping stones to the next generation. You can find the link to the group here.

http://www.Facebook.com/groups/101796346596410/members/

One Voice had a mission that I wrote to inspire people.

“In the milestones of who we are, it took one voice to change our future. We will not give in. There are various aspects to one voice, different dimensions, and levels. The issues of equality and the issues of this generation will pave the road to our future. It’s about humanity. We need to take a stand. One Voice is that forum, that project, is that podium produced by House of SVOI owned and operated by Katherine Symthe. The stepping stone began with one voice taking a stand.” (One Voice Mission)

When Danielle and I had dinner next, I told her about ONE VOICE.

She was excited that I was taking a stand.

Danielle hugs me,

“You need to also give hope. While you are angry at what happened, you need to show others that there is hope. That they can survive, that their voice is important. I would like to see ONE VOICE give hope to others.”

I thought about what Danielle said and she was absolutely correct. At the time, all I could think about was doing anything to please Danielle and make her proud of me. There could be no mistake on my part. Someone needs to offer hope so I sat down and thought about it all night. In that moment I decided that I was going to create a series of podcasts when I saw issues arise in the community and address them. No one should ever think that they are alone. There are too many people in their life think that they are alone. The time to change the reality was now.

Random moments often become the stepping stones for other opportunities. Currently, at the time of this books release, One VOICE has gone silent. There was a time that the project served as a stepping stone to equality within the gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered community. The lives that ONE VOICE has touched had been amazing. The project once received a thank you letter from the WE GIVE A DAMN campaign operated by Cyndi Lauper. ONE VOICE still exists under my company, HOUSE OF SVOI. One day that project might come back to life. One Voice became a foundation for me to create other video series. I shall remember One Voice in how it led me to create other shows.

THE INFAMOUS CAR
Random acts of kindness from the heart are always the noblest. I had a car that I named Miranda. She was a maroon, four door, Hyundai Elantra. I had gone through hell and back in repairs with this car. It was only benefiting that I called her Miranda after the actress Miranda Richardson who played the infamous character from the movie The Crying Game.

On September 29^th, 2011 Danielle was coming to visit me in the morning. I had just gotten off work however I was willing to loose sleep to be with my girlfriend. Danielle texted me saying that she had an unexpected surprise for me. She had her son with her. In the past, Danielle had not wanted me to meet her children until she knew for sure that we would work out. Her children became attached to her ex girlfriend. When they did not work out, the children were devastated. She asked if I could watch him while she ran an errand and then she would be right back. I agreed to this. Danielle asked me a special favor when watching her son.

“Please don’t let on to my son, that you are my wife, my girlfriend,” Danielle tells me.

“I understand however we did exchange vows in private and they’ll figure out that we are together. When will you tell them about us?” I ask sternly.

Danielle sighs,

“Soon, you have to understand we are a Mexican family and I have to figure out a way to tell them. I love you and you know this.”

“I know, see you soon.” I replied disappointed. I hung up my cell phone shaking my head. Danielle and I made an agreement that she would not introduce me to her children or family as her girlfriend or that we exchanged private vows as wives. Danielle gave me a long story about how she wanted to make sure that we were solid. She didn’t want to further traumatize her children to yet another disappointment. I related especially to the children. However, in my heart, I was saddened.

I start a pot of coffee when I receive a frantic phone call from Danielle. She has been pulled over in front of my apartment complex. I immediately drive to the front of the complex. The police are there taking her information. Danielle directs her son to go to my vehicle. He slowly gets into the back of my car. He smiles at me with nervousness. I smiled back assuring him that everything would be okay. In my mind I was not sure how this was going to play out.

Danielle didn’t know that I knew about her past. I found out by accident. A few days ago I wanted to find her profile on Google and found something that she never shared with me. It was a mug shot of her arrest record. She had a small record of a misdemeanor c for theft and possession of marijuana. When I discovered this information I had to think about why Danielle never told me. I was in no position to judge someone’s past as I have hidden my past of being abused. I decided to keep the information to myself and allow Danielle to tell me in her own time.

Slowly, I walk over to the Danielle to see what was going on. Danielle is shaking.

“Are you okay?” I ask.

“I was driving on an expired license and my tags are expired. Not my day. And to top it off, the car is not in my name. It’s in my ex-husbands.”

I smile at Danielle,

“Just wait here, “I said

I walk over to the Police Officer.

“Morning, Officer. What’s going to happen?” I ask.

“Well her license is expired, tags expired and the vehicle is not in her name. Who are you?” Officer asks.

I calmly look at the officer,

“She is my girlfriend and she is coming to see me. Take the vehicle and put her in my custody. Don’t do anything more please, not in front of her child,” I state.

The officer asks for my identification which I gave. The officer runs my identification coming back to me, smiling.

“Thank you for your service. I have paperwork to run, she can stay,” Officer states.

The police officer starts writing up paper work as I walk back to my car on the driver’s side. Danielle’s son looks nervous as he looks out the back window of my car. I could sense that he was panicked. I reflected back on the information that I had just learned about Danielle’s arrest record in the past. I could understand that her son was worried that his mother would go back to jail. My only hope at this point was that the officer would be true to his word and not arrest Danielle and that she could stay as per his promise.

Danielle’s son turns around, looks right at me, asking,

”Is Mom going to jail again?”

I smile at the boy trying to reassure him,

“No not if I can help it,” I replied.

“You do know mom used to be in jail and we had to visit her on the

weekends right, Miss Kat?

I look at this boy, soon to be my stepson. What words could I say to ease his worries about his mother, my girlfriend? I felt as though his admission about his mother being in jail was a test to see if I would abandon him or his mother. Little did he realize that I already knew the truth and would not judge or run.

“Sometimes people make mistakes however we cannot judge. I know that she was in jail and what for. I still love her,” I said instinctively. Suddenly, I realized I said love her and her son did not know about us yet. Damn it, I had just told Danielle that I would not let it slip that we were together. However her son was worried and I needed to give him assurance that they were okay.

“Love?” The boy asks confused. I could see that he was trying to make a connection.

“Yes love, friends love one another.” I reply nervously.

Danielle walks to my car and gets in on the passenger side. I felt relieved as this conversation with her son had become awkward. We drove to my apartment. When we arrived at the apartment we went inside. The son instantly fell in love with my cat Mr. Sky.

Danielle was visibly shaken and motioned to me that she wanted to talk to me in private. She kisses her son, hugging him. You could tell that they had a deep bond. She instructs her son to stay inside as she needed to talk to me in private. We go outside to my patio, lighting a cigarette.

Danielle shakes her head in dismay.

“I am embarrassed that my car has been taken away. Now I have no vehicle for work at the catering company. With me being a team captain that isn't going to bode well for me.” Tears fill Danielle’s eyes.

I immediately begin to think of a solution for the love of my life. I knew if I just sat for a minute that a solution would come to me. It was only a matter of time. Danielle begins to panic again as I listen.

“Just when things are going well something bad always has to happen” Danielle stated.

Then it hit me as I think I found a solution.

“Yeah well it’s a good thing you have me. I have a solution.” I stated confidently.

“Follow me to the bedroom and I’ll tell you my solution,” I stated.

I go online on my computer to check my bank account. Yes, the solution is there. I have an extra 500 dollars. Now it’s just a matter of telling Danielle. I know that she can be stubborn however if she understands my proposal then it will work. Danielle looks at me as she sits next to me on my bed.

“What is your solution?” Danielle asks.

“I am going to give you my car and I am going to buy a new car for me,” I said.

Danielle looks at me with shock regarding my solution. Danielle could not believe what was happening.

“No, no I can’t” Danielle states.

I grab Danielle by her hands, staring into her beautiful eyes,

“Look at me, I can do this. Time is running out. You have to be at work. Without a vehicle you’ll lose your job based on what you are telling me,”

Danielle looks at me. Tears once again fill her eyes.

“No one has ever done this for me. Why would you do this for me?”

I smile, looking at this beautiful woman,

“I hate that you were mistreated by others. I’m doing this because I love you. I will not allow you to lose your job; if I can do anything I will stop this,” I said.

Danielle looks at me as she leans her head into my chest and arms crying.

“Why are you crying, honey?” I ask.

“ I’ve never had anyone love me like you do, Kat. I am so happy that I am your true love and that we are married and will do this in front of everyone.” Danielle replies as she gently kisses me.

I sigh knowing that I just provided the solution out of this tedious problem. If there is a will there is a way. Danielle looks at me in the eyes,

“I am so happy that Spirit finally answered my prayers and gave you to me.” Danielle cries even more.

I continue to hold Danielle in my arms. Her son is in my living room.

My thoughts are complete as I hold my girlfriend, my wife. This is what family was about in my perspective. Family in my eyes was about being there for one another.

“Danielle, we go through darkness to find the light. I’ll never let you down,” I assert strongly.

Danielle smiles at me as she wiping her tears away. Gently she lays me back on my bed lying on top of me, kissing me. Danielle stops looking into my eyes.

“You are so special to me. You’ve been through such evil and yet you came out so beautiful so loving. Thank you for you.”

Danielle and I sit up in bed as she checks on her son in my living room. I tell her that we need to go outside and drive my car.

She looks at me with curiosity.

“I do know how to drive a stick” Danielle smirks.

I laugh,

“Yes, you may however when they installed the new engine it was an automatic engine and the car was a stick so my shade tree mechanics converted it to make it work.

Danielle looks at me oddly,

“Okay, that’s different.”

“It drives like an automatic but it shifts weird,” I state.

We walk outside as I give Danielle the keys to my car Miranda. Danielle drives around the complex with ease. I smile at Danielle as she is driving around. The fact that she had no problem driving the vehicle led me to believe that this was a sign from Spirit. This was all meant to be. Everything happens for a reason. Danielle gets out of the vehicle looking at me.

“Are you sure?”Danielle asks.

I nod my head in assurance as we walk back inside my apartment.

“Yes. What I will do is put my new vehicle on my insurance

and I’ll pay for the insurance on your car now.”

Danielle looks at me,

“I, I...”

“That way you’ve a break. You’ve been saying you can’t seem to

catch a break. Well I am giving it to you. And I am paying for your insurance from this point on. Now you have a break.”

Danielle becomes emotional hugging me. I could see that her son was making a connection that we were just more than friends.

That night, Danielle and I rearranged our schedules so that she could take me to work until I bought my new car. The night came and Danielle drops me off at my restaurant I. She meets my head server Maria.

I will always remember what Maria told Danielle in the parking lot. Maria was the type of woman that just told you like it was. She did not care if you didn’t like it or if it hurt your feelings. Maria often had other servers upset over her style of communication. The irony was that customers adored Maria. Customers would walk out the door if she was not working that day and come back only when she was on duty. Maria felt like she had a duty to tell you what was on her mind. In looking back, Maria somehow knew what Danielle was going to do.

“Well, well it’s nice to finally meet Danielle, the woman that Kat has changed her whole world for.” Maria states with arrogance.

“Thank you. I do love her. She is great.” Danielle states.

I remember Maria just looking at Danielle standoffish. Two Mexican women were standing their ground. It was awkward on several levels. I couldn’t understand why Maria was being so standoffish. She has never been that way with me.

“I hope you do love her. I would hate to think that you were just using her, giving her empty promises because you know she never had family,” Maria states crossing her arms.

Danielle looks at Maria with a weird look on her face as though she had been caught.

“I would never do that to, Kat.” Danielle argues.

“We’ll see. Nice meeting you” Maria said walking off.

I look at Danielle apologizing for Maria’s behavior. Danielle kisses me in the parking lot, hugging me,

“I love you baby. Have a great night.”

The next day on September 30, 2011 I went to the dealership and for two hours I fought to get a vehicle. Finally I met the owner of the lot. He looks at me with concern.

“It’s hard with your credit to get you a vehicle.”

“Look I already gave my car to my girlfriend. I need a car. I am trying to help here. There has to be a solution.” I argue.

The owner shakes his head and suddenly realizes what I am saying.

“Wait, you gave your car away leaving you with no vehicle. Then prayed that you would come here and get one?”

I smile,

“Yes, it’s called a leap of faith.” I said.

“I’ve never seen anyone do that,” He replies.

The owner works another two hours and finally qualifies me for a 2002 Dodge Mini Van. The condition was that I had to put 2000 dollars down. I placed 500 down. The next three paychecks I would have to give 500. I rearranged all my bills and in some cases did not pay a few bills to make this happen. I never let Danielle know that I had to pay over 2,000 to make it happen. A lot of my friends helped make it happen. My friends were amazed that I had such faith to help someone. I was determined to make sure that Danielle would not lose her job. In the process I have been set financially back.

I remember what the owner said when we closed the deal on my vehicle,

“I wish there were more people like you. Never have I seen such an act of kindness”

I simply responded,

“It’s the honorable thing to do. I had the ability to help and I did. How many of you can help someone and you walk away?”

ROMANTIC NIGHTS
The times that I spent with Danielle were filled with Romance, randomness and adventure. In the truest sense Danielle had turned me out, a sexual awakening to my womanhood. It was like Tandem Jumping out of an airplane with the adrenaline pumping. You receive a high. Together we explored one another in every sense of the matter on all levels of our bodies, friendship and relationship. It was a bond of deep rooted connection.

We met on her days off. Our schedules were so crazy due to the hours that we worked. I’d call or text Danielle my schedule every Monday and she would tell me hers. We had our time at least one to two days a week. During the week we always called one another or texted. Danielle saw our time together as precious. In the third week of the relationship, I gave Danielle a copy my apartment key. When Danielle worked on my side of town she would visit me during her lunch hour which happened a lot.

One morning I woke Danielle for work. Danielle had a difficult time waking up to her alarm clock. I agreed to help her by calling her every morning which became a ritual to us. She always told me

“I love you waking me and wish I was next to you.”

“Me too” I said.

“When you go to bed this morning, be naked so on my lunch hour I can come for desert,” Danielle requests.

It was twelve noon as I slept peacefully when suddenly I feel something in my bed. Suddenly Danielle jumps on top of me, kissing me. It was an intense hour of sex, and love. Danielle is getting dressed when she sits next to me on the bed.

“I love you and love that you are naked waiting for me.”

“I’m yours,” I respond.

“We are each other’s soul mate,” Danielle responds.

I remember one morning we were together and she had received a call from work and had to leave. She was annoyed and pissed that she had to go. Danielle is getting dressed. We are standing next to my bedroom window when she places her hand on my heart.

“Do you feel that?” She asks.

“Yes your hand on my heart,” I respond.

Danielle smiles, caressing my face softly.

“I love you, and will always be here for you. I want you to know this, feel this and believe this,” she states strongly.

I look her intensely.

“I know that you love me,” I said.

“I’m your family now, and my family is your family. We will, I will always protect you, and adore you,” Danielle states as she kisses me and leaves going to work.

Danielle was soft spoken in her words to me. She always knew how to look into my eyes, and smile.

For our third month anniversary, I bought Danielle a pure turquoise necklace with a poem that I had written to her. Danielle’s eyes beamed with excitement over the necklace. I had worked 80 hours that week to purchase the gift. We lay down on my floor, with a candle lit and began talking about life, relationships and us.

“In my past, my exes always saw me as ugly, cheated on me and left,” Danielle whispers with sadness in her voice.

“I’m not like that,” I respond.

“No you’re not. You’re special, loving and kind,” she responds as she looks off to the side. I caress her face so she knew I was there for her.

She looks back at me,

“What did I ever do to deserve you?” she asks.

“You loved me!” I said.

Danielle smiles,

“You’re easy to love, to touch, to hold, to be your wife is a gift.”

“I know the feeling because of my evil family that abused me,” as I sighed with a touch of sadness.

“I’ll never hurt you. You’re mine.”

Danielle kisses me as we become intimate with each other. Two hours pass with our intimate adventure on the floor as Danielle showed me sexual positions for a stronger orgasm. I’m thirsty from our adventure on the floor. I walk into the kitchen drinking diet coke. Danielle joins me in the kitchen. She seems concerned.

“I don’t want you drinking soda because it’s bad for your health.”

I look at her thinking okay. Danielle holds my face looking into my eyes.

“Promise me that you will stop drinking soda”

I promised Daniel that I would never drink soda again. She kisses me as she throws my soda out. She turns to me once more in the kitchen.

“Remember, I will know if you drink soda because we feel each other.

You are making a promise to me, your wife and soul mate. Soul mates never break their promises to one another.” Danielle stated. I agree to the promise.

There was a particular day in October that I was having a hard day at work. Customers were rude and my night servers were being drama queens. I am in the kitchen cooking when my server, Lena bursts into the kitchen.

“Boss Lady, you need to get out of the kitchen.”

I scoff at her,

“Why?”

Lena points to the dining room straight ahead.

“Just look out the galley Boss Lady. Damn she’s Boss Lady. Good job.”

Danielle is sitting in booth 22 which was right in front of the galley where you could see into the kitchen. I smile seeing my lady there. She was dressed all in black. Her hair was down. She always knew I loved seeing her hair down. Lena took over cooking as I left the kitchen to join Danielle.

I sit down smiling.

“What’s wrong, honey?” I ask.

“Work was difficult and everything always falls on me as the team captain,” Danielle replies. Danielle was a team captain for a prominent catering company in San Antonio, Texas.

“You’re here now, and that’s all that matters,” I say.

Danielle reaches with her left hand, grabbing my hand. She squeezes my hand.

“All that I could think of was you, being next to you, breathing you, touching you. You are what helped me make it through this day. When I got off I had to come to you.”

Lena prepares a meal for Danielle as I ask the servers to get Danielle an un-sweet tea. Ten minutes later, Lena brings her meal as she is eating. It was a Tilapia with white rice. Danielle loved white rice. We began talking about work.

“What food don’t you like? I want to make you dinner sometime,” Danielle asks.

“I’m not picky. Just don’t serve me escargot or white rice,” I commented. Danielle has a puzzled look on her face then realizes the rice had to do with my past.

“What did they do to you?”

“My mother forced me to eat maggots as child. She said I was a bastard child she hated and couldn’t stand the sight of me,” I said.

Danielle puts her fork down.

“Honey! Your mother was wrong. You’re not a bastard. I have you now and I love you,” Danielle remarks.

Danielle finishes her meal while I pay for the ticket plus tip to the server when Jack comes up to me. Jack is one of my primary servers on Graveyard. He is a guy that one does not want to mess with. He stands six feet and 300 pounds, well built with a beard. He is a bouncer at his second job. Jack was chosen for our graveyard shift because of the problems that we have been having with the drunks. Danielle and I are standing next to booth 22.

“So Kat, this your lady?”

“Pardon him please, he is very direct,” I say.

“I like that. Yes, I’m her girlfriend,” Danielle says as she shakes Jack’s hand.

“I’ve heard a lot about you,” Jack says standing there like he was holding a booth up.

“Kat has told me that you help keep her safe here with the rowdy people,”

“Yes, Kat is always right and I keep an eye on her,”

Danielle looks at me then walks up to Jack.

“Make me a promise, Jack,” Danielle demands.

Jack and I look at one another as to the nature of this request.

“Okay,” Jack responds hesitantly.

“I need to know that you’ll protect her. I want Kat coming home to me every night. I don’t want a phone call that she’s been hurt. She’s the love of my life. I’ll hold you personally liable if something happens to her and I don’t think you want to deal with me,” Danielle states staring into Jacks eyes.

Jack doesn’t know what to think of Danielle’s question slash threat. He backs up a step,

“You truly love her? You won’t leave her?” Jack asks.

At this point, I am feeling awkward. There are two people going back and forth over my love and safety.

“Yes, I love Kat. I’ll never hurt her. I wished for her,” Danielle answers.

Jack raises his head.

“Done, I’ll protect Kat with my life and as a spiritual brother, I will protect her on all levels physically and spiritually,” Jack states.

Danielle and Jack hug one another.

“Good,”

Danielle and I walk outside the restaurant. She smiles at me in a way that I knew I was safe. Her conversation with Jack was unexpected. She pushes to the left of the restaurant to walk that way. We walk to the left of the restaurant on the side.

“Is there any cameras here? Much traffic?” Danielle asks.

“No camera and no traffic by this side of the restaurant. Why?” I ask.

Danielle leans against the wall, grabbing me by my vest and shirt, pulling me into her. She begins kissing me on the neck. We kiss passionately. She rolls me over as my back is now against the wall. She begins to caress my breasts.

“You’re so naughty,”

“Yes and I like being on top of you,” Daniel responds kissing me on my neck as she begins to work her way down my shirt.

“You were so romantic inside with Jack,”

She continues as she works her way back up my neck, whispering into my ear,

“You’re mine and I want nothing happening to you.”

Suddenly, she opens the upper part of my shirt and proceeds to kiss me so hard that she leaves a bruise, a mark on my chest. It turns me on even further. She lets go after a few minutes, smiling,

“Something to remember me by until we are together again. And every time we are together, I’ll give you this.”

I smile looking down,

“Your mark, you’re branding me. I love it,” I said.

Danielle’s mark became another staple in our relationship. Every time after this night she would leave a mark. It was a private sexual thing between us. I would know that I was hers. The mark couldn't be seen by public as she always left it under my shirt.

Danielle and I French kiss for a while then start laughing like school girls. The intoxication of being naughty at my work place was exciting and thrilling. I have never done that before while I was on the clock let alone outside where we could be discovered publicly. An adventure that sparked an even deeper love. Danielle drove home as I returned back to my job inside. I beamed and bounced as a new kid that just received a toy.