Jason thompson

(NOTE: Alternately, if this panel is too crowded, this could just be a closeup of Theodore’s face from within the tent, as he opens the tent from outside. However, it’d be nice to have a medium shot here, since panels 4 and 5 were closeups.)
THEODORE:

ALL RIGHT! I'M BACK!
FX:

UNZIP
PAGE 52
Panel 1. Real world. Bird's eye view re-establishing shot of the gaming table within the cave-like tent. Theodore gets back into his seat. Mike looks pleased with his cleverness. Shesh looks coolly confident, ignoring the daggers that Jen sends into him (literally or figuratively) with her angry gaze. Callie might be covering her mouth with her hand or otherwise preparing for an awkward situation. Bill looks about the same as usual.
THEODORE:

WHERE WERE WE…? THAT'S RIGHT, THE SNAKE MEN! IT'S KAMIKO'S TURN!
Panel 2. Real world. Theodore and Mike.
MIKE:

SINCE THE SNAKE MEN ARE VULNERABLE TO LYME'S DISEASE, I'M GOING TO CAST THE SPELL "TICK SWARM"!
THEODORE (in big-eyed shock):

WHAT?!
Panel 3. Real world. Long shot of the table, perhaps bird's eye view again.
BILL:

I STRIKE THE GIANT SNAKE IN ITS UNPROTECTED UVULA!
THEODORE (shocked):

WHAT?!
SHESH:

I'M GONNA SEARCH THE EAST WALL FOR SECRET DOORS!
THEODORE (again, shocked):

WHAT?!
Panel 4.Game world. Long shot of the underground chamber. The characters have defeated the giant snake and all the snake-men whose corpses fill the chapter shin-deep. Sophonisba is slitting the throat of a supine snake-man with a dagger. Aerfen looks pissed off by the other three characters. who are celebrating and jumping for joy (except for Bill, who is just reading his books as usual) in the other side of the room.
MIKE/KAMIKO:

YAAAY! WE TOTALLY GOT THEM!
SHESH/GRATHKAMOG:

PWNED!!!
PAGE 53
Panel 1. Real world. In the foreground, Mike and Shesh exchange a high-five. In the background, behind his DM's screen and past the miniatures table littered with fallen snake-man miniatures, Theodore looks a bit confused and worried by this turn of events; he can't bring himself to believe the obvious answer as to what happened.
MIKE & SHESH: (high-fiving)

CALABOZOS HIGH SCHOOL REPRESENT!
MIKE:

AH, SOON THE BLESSED WATER OF LIFE WILL BE RETURNED TO OUR STRUGGLING PEOPLE!
SHESH:

BRING ON THE XP!
Panel 2. Real world. Closeup of Theodore from the previous panel, looking insecure and nervous. Little sweatdrops run down his forehead. His 20-sided die necklace and book are visible.
THEODORE:

O-OKAY…VERY RESOURCEFUL…WHAT'S YOUR NEXT MOVE?
Panel 3. Game world. Large panel. The adventuring party, with Grathkamog, Kamiko and Bill now in the lead (although Sophonisba and Aerfen are still coming along), goes down a narrow spiral staircase and emerges in a distinctly different-looking dungeon corridor, one even more cave-like and slimy. Strolling along with his hammer slung over his shoulder, Grathkamog casually talks to the G.M. as if he's talking to the ceiling, and the G.M.'s voice booms back from offscreen.
SHESH/GRATHKAMOG:

ALL RIGHT THEN -- WE OPEN THE SECRET DOOR AND HEAD 100' DOWN THE WEST CORRIDOR! WE GO DOWN THE HIDDEN SIDE STAIRCASE, AVOIDING THE TRAP ON THE MAIN STAIRS! THEN WE GO TO THE ROOM WITH THE 12 BABOON MEN AND THE IDOL!
THEODORE (OS):

WHAT?!!!
Panel 4. Real world. Realizing what happened, in shock, Theodore turns to Callie.
THEODORE:

CALLIE…?!
CALLIE (eyes closed, disdainful, "it's none of my business"):

I TOLD THEM NOT TO.
Panel 5. Real world. His eyes wide with disbelief and betrayal, Theodore turns back to Shesh and Mike, who are still on top of the world.
THEODORE:

DID…DID YOU READ MY ADVENTURE?
SHESH (proudly):

TA-DA! LATERAL THINKING!
MIKE/KAMIKO:

I TAKE THE HEALING POTION HIDDEN UNDER THE RUBBLE BY THE DOOR!
PAGE 54

(NOTE: I don’t think this page has too many panels. If any panel could be deleted, it’d be panel 1, but I think it’s good as-is; panels 1, 2 and 5 are small and the page is text-light. Having panel 1 adds a little more build-up to panel three, making it a two-step close-up on Theodore (panels 1-3) instead of a one-step closeup.)
Panel 1. Real world. Small-ish panel. Theodore stares at Shesh with total shock. Shesh has a totally smug expression, eyes closed.
THEODORE:

YOU LOOKED AT…MY WORLD…
SHESH:

C'MON DUDE! IT'S JUST A GAME!
SHESH (second balloon):

12 BABOON MEN! RACK 'EM UP!

(NOTE: This balloon could be eliminated for space reasons if necessary.)
Panel 2. Slight close-up of the previous panel, with only Theodore visible. Theodore sits with his hands on his laptop. His head is lowered, so that his cap and hair cover his eyes; his expression is inscrutable, in shadow. Yu-Gi-Oh-style shonen sound effects creep from left to right across the panel, like a drumbeat starting soft and getting louder.
FX:

D- D- D- D-
Panel 3. Big panel. Slight worm's eye view. With his eyes still concealed by his hair, but his mouth grimly set, Theodore suddenly flings the laptop up into the air behind him! Speedlines and drama lines! The "DOOM" FX is like the big drumbeat/cymbal-crash at the end of the "D-D-D-D-"s.
FX:

DOOM
Panel 4. Sudden camera angle switch. In the foreground, Theodore reaches for his iPod and (with his other hand) for some hand-written notes. His eyes are set in a new, cold, steely expression. In the background, Shesh and Mike stare at him with cartoony aghast expressions, the kind we're seeing so much of in this story. Coming from off-panel is the sound effect of Theodore's laptop presumably smashing to pieces as it hits the wall of the tent, with a few pieces of flying machinery thrown in for good measure.
FX (laptop crashing):

CRASH
THEODORE:

RIGHT…WHERE WERE WE…THE ADVENTURE…
Panel 5. Small-ish panel. Closeup of Shesh's hand on his iPod, which is plugged into the speakers. Shesh selects a playlist titled "DEATH MARCH." A Sri Lankan Tree Roach crawls nearby on the table.
FX:

KLIK
THEODORE (OS):

I MEAN THE "GAME"…
Panel 6. Game world. Mid-sized panel. Descending the spiral stairs, the adventuring party emerges from an archway into a room which is as yet unseen.
THEODORE (OS):

AS YOU STEP THROUGH THE ARCHWAY, YOU SEE…
PAGE 55
Panel 1. Game world (as are all the panels on this page). Really big panel, bird's-eye view. At the bottom of the page, the characters have stepped out of the archway to find themselves at one end of a huge, cavelike underground room. At the far end is the Idol of Life (see panel 2), with a small pool of water, little more than a puddle, at the base. More significantly, the room is crowded with hideous monsters which fill the corners and sides of the room in a huge horde. There are baboon-men, bat-men, giant four-legged furry things with a body like a bear and pincered heads like a potato bug, crawling things with drill-shaped heads…hundreds of them, in a giant monstrous mass. Most of the creatures have some sort of human or humanoid features, like incongruously human ears or hands on otherwise alien-looking things. They're mutants.
FX (for drama):

BAM
Panel 2. Closeup of the Idol of Life in the previous panel. It doesn't look much like the imaginary idol shown on page 22's bottom panel, although it, too, is holding a trickling bowl of water in its hands. It's much more sinister and primitive-looking; a thick, crouching stone idol with a vaguely Mesoamerican/Babylonian look. Its face is bestial and skull-like, and the water trickles into the bowl from its toothy mouth, before trickling out onto the floor. Its eyes are big faceted jewels.
Panel 3. Return to a shot similar to page 46, panel 6. The characters are aghast by the horde of monsters facing them. Kamiko counts them and points at them, while Grathkamog angrily shouts at the sky. The little girl on Kamiko's back is partially concealed by Kamiko's hair and what we can see of her face has an inscrutable expression.
KAMIKO:

12, 13, 14, 15…
SHESH/GRATHKAMOG:

HEY! YOUR FILE SAID 12 BABOON MEN! TWELVE!
PAGE 56
Panel 1. Real world. Small panel. At the gaming table, Jen holds her head in her hands in frustration while Shesh tries to argue his point and Mike looks a little bothered and disappointed. Theodore is off panel.
SHESH:

THAT'S NOT FAIR! YOU'RE CHANGING THE ADVENTURE!
JEN:

YOU IDIOTS.
Panel 2. Real world. Big panel. At the far end of the gaming table, behind his screen and beyond the miniatures mat, Theodore sits defensively with his arms and legs crossed, looking offscreen at the players, the cold-hearted lord of his domain. His eyes are steely.
THEODORE:

YOU FORGET I'M THE GAME MASTER! I'VE CREATED ALL 25,460 SEPARATE FIVE-FOOT SQUARES OF THIS ADVENTURE, AND I CAN CHANGE THEM HOWEVER I FEEL LIKE!
THEODORE (second balloon):

ALL OF YOU MAKE ESCHATOLOGY ROLLS!
Panel 3. Game world. Medium panel. Aerfen and Bill, looking out at the scene before them. Aerfen looks suddenly shocked as she realizes something. Inset in her word balloon is a 20-sided die with the number "20" on top.
JEN/AERFEN:

OH NO! THAT STYLE OF SCULPTURE!
Panel 4. Game world. Big panel, sort of a montage. On one side we see Aerfen's head, looking wary and shocked, a close-up of the previous panel. On the other side and around her we see the Idol of Life, as hideous as before, and the water pouring from it in a stream. Ordinary animals are drinking the water, or sinking into the puddle, and as they touch it they mutate into grotesque monsters -- similar to the baboon men and snake men we've seen previously, or even more hideous. It's a progressive picture showing the animals writhing and changing as they become more and more mutated by the water. We also see a flashback of the bloody wall in the ruined village reading "BEWARE SNYRG".
JEN/AERFEN:

THE IDOL OF LIFE IS AN EVIL GOD! THE WATER DOESN'T JUST GRANT LIFE…IT TWISTS IT! THE BABOON MEN, THE SNAKE MEN…THEY'RE ALL NORMAL ANIMALS MUTATED BY THE WATERS OF SNYRG!
PAGE 57
Panel 1. Game world. Grathkamog and Kamiko stand with jaws agape, with a threatening shadowy mass of monsters in the background. Kamiko's in the foreground, and the little girl is still clinging to her shoulders, hanging on her back. We can't see the little girl's face, however, as it's hidden by Kamiko's hair…in a now somewhat creepy manner. The little girl's hands clutch Kamiko tighter.
MIKE/KAMIKO:

THEN IT WAS ALL FOR NOTHING?! THE WATER CAN'T SAVE MY VILLAGE! IF THE CHILDREN DRINK IT THEN THEY'LL…
FX:

GRIP
Panel 2. Game world. Small panel. Kamiko turns to look at the little girl, who is still clinging tightly onto Kamiko's shoulders. We see Kamiko's face and the back of the little girl's head.
MIKE/KAMIKO:

…SUZY…?
Panel 3. Game world. Larger panel. We see the back of Kamiko's head now, and the little girl's full face, as they look eachother in the eye. The little girl's face has stretched out and her jaw has enlarged massively, opening up like a viper's with great curling tusks like a sea anemone's tentacles, around her enormous mouth. Basically the whole lower half of her face opens up down to her neck, a bit like in this comic by Jen Wang (http://www.jenwang.net/art/comics/touchfood/). Her eyes are flattened and pushed to the sides of her head and are slitted like a snake's. She still has her long hair and general body shape. Perhaps her eyes are crying a bit, but it's crocodile tears.
LITTLE GIRL:

I SURVIVED…BY DRINKING…THE WATER…
Panel 4. Game world. Large panel, action scene. In the center of the scene is Kamiko, with her back to the camera. The little girl-monster, still clinging to Kamiko's shoulder, lunges its head viciously forward and, like in the manga Parasyte, clearly bites off most of Kamiko's face (even though it's not as gross as it would be because she's facing away from us). Kamiko's body is twisted around by the force of the bite, and one of her arms still clutches the bamboo broom. In the middleground, the other player-characters are caught my surprise and horror, and in the background, as in panel 2, is the solid shadowy wall of hideous monsters.
FX (big):
CHOMP

PAGE 58
Panel 1. Game world (as are all the panels on this page). In the foreground, we see the dark silhouette of Kamiko's body hitting the ground in a spray of blood, while the tiny, devil-doll-like silhouette of the little-girl-monster pounces on it from above. In the background, more horrified faces of the surviving player-characters.
FX:

SPLTHUNK
Panel 2. Close-up. No longer merely silhouetted, the little-girl-monster is in the foreground, still hideous-looking, crouched on the chest of a mercifully vague bloody object, Kamiko's body. It rips a round object loose from the corpse, leaving its forearms soaked in blood. It's completely intent on what it's doing. In the background, Aerfen's look of horror turns to one of rage and vengeance.
LITTLE GIRL-MONSTER:

MMM…EYEBALLS…
FX: (as many gross flesh-eating FX as seem necessary)

RIP MUNCH SLURP RIP
Panel 3. Medium shot. All the surviving characters strike at the little-girl, but it vanishes in a flash, moving too quickly to be seen, leaving only some speedlines and a SFX behind. Aerfen's sword, Grathkamog's fairly lame-looking throwing caltrops, and Sophonisba's magic spell all miss, striking the ground or Kamiko's corpse instead.
JEN/AERFEN:

GET HER!


CALLIE/SOPHONISBA:

ULTRA GASH INFERNO!
FX (of creature vanishing):

FSHT
Panel 4. A new camera angle. In the foreground, the little-girl monster reappears, clinging/climbing onto the side of the idol of Snyrg, having moved out of the way so quickly it's like it became invisible. In the background, the player-characters turn their heads to see it, horrified by its speed.
PLAYER CHARACTERS:

!
FX (of creature reappearing)

FSHT
LITTLE GIRL-MONSTER:

SO SLOW…
Panel 5. Closeup of the little-girl monster, still totally nasty-looking as it will remain for the rest of the comic, clinging to the side of the idol with its mouthparts agape.
LITTLE GIRL-MONSTER:

EAT YOU… UNTAINTED MEAT SO TASTY…YOUR BONES AND GRISTLE MAKE SACRIFICE TO SNYRG!
PAGE 59
Panel 1. Big panel. From all around the room, at the little-girl-monster's command, the mutant monsters finally swarm upon the characters. Speedlines, emphasis lines everywhere! The player-characters are surrounded!
LITTLE GIRL-MONSTER (OS OR POSITION UNCLEAR):

GET THEM, SERVANTS OF SNYRG! DIE, DIE!
Panel 2. Real world. Medium shot of the gaming table. Jen, Mike and Callie turn to look as Shesh stands up from his chair.
FX:

STAND
Panel 3. Closeup of Shesh. He's had enough.
SHESH:

THIS IS DUMB. I'M SORRY WE LOOKED AT YOUR LAPTOP, OKAY? BUT WE'RE NOT GONNA STICK AROUND JUST SO YOU CAN KILL US.
Panel 4. Closeup of Theodore. He's mad too. Emphasis lines.
THEODORE:

NO, I THINK YOU WILL STICK AROUND!
Panel 5. Medium shot of the gaming table. Shesh and Theodore, both totally mad. Mike is also visible in the shot.
THEODORE:

OR PERHAPS YOU'D LIKE ME TO TELL THE R.A.S ABOUT THE RACIST POLISH JOKE YOU MADE?! I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW--I WAS OFFENDED! I AM POLISH!
SHESH:

WHY YOU--! MIKE, YOU GET OUT OF HERE, I'LL DEAL WITH THIS!
PAGE 60
Panel 1. Real world. Small-medium panel. Theodore and Mike, closer shot. Theodore recognizes Mike's name and his expression changes, so that he seems genuinely interested/surprised, totally losing the anger for a second. Meanwhile, Mike is sweating a bit, wondering what's coming next.
THEODORE:

HOLD ON! MIKE? MIKE BA?
MIKE:

Y-YES! HOW DO YOU KNOW…?
Panel 2. Real world. Big panel. Theodore's face explodes in vengeful fury again, while Mike recoils in horror. From behind the G.M.'s screen Theodore produces Mike's missing high school yearbook. It is open to the "Clubs" section, and on an open page, clearly visible, is a picture labeled "Furry Club -- Mike Ba". It's a photo of Mike standing next to a couple of people in fursuits, foxgirls and dog-girls, etc.: the girls have swimsuits on over the fursuits. Mike, the only person in normal clothes, is giving a thumb's up. The top margin of the page says “Calabozos High School Yearbook 20XX”.
THEODORE:

WHAT A COINCIDENCE! I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR THE PERSON THIS BELONGED TO! OR PERHAPS I'LL PUT COPIES ALL OVER THE DORM!
MIKE:

NOOOO! SO THAT'S WHERE I DROPPED IT!
Panel 3. Real world. Small panel. His rage vented on the other two players, Theodore turns to Bill Harminc with a furious expression, but he doesn't have to do much; Bill instantly folds, with sweatdrops all over his face. (Presumably Theodore has some incredibly awful blackmail material on Bill as well, but that’ll have to be saved for another chapter.)
THEODORE:

AND AS FOR YOU, BILL HARMINC--
BILL:

NOOO! I'LL PLAY! I'LL PLAY!
Panel 4. Game world. Medium panel. In the foreground, Sophonisba, looking a little frustrated/bored with the whole situation, tries to make a deal with the GM. She’s basically talking “off-camera”, while the voice of the GM (Theodore) answers her as a spiky “loud” word balloon from offscreen, or from the top of the panel, as if it were God talking. I think this will make sense visually, particularly if Theodore’s word balloon is “spiky” and doesn’t look like the word balloons of the other characters. In the background, Aerfen and Grathkamog look startled by Sophonisba’s blatant treachery, while the surrounding horde of monsters is also visible in the far background.
SOPHONISBA:

HEY, CAN I JUST DRINK THE WATER AND BECOME A MONSTER?
THEODORE (annoyed, off-camera voice, possibly in a different font):

NO! IT TAKES WEEKS OF EXPOSURE! THANKS FOR WATCHING MY LAPTOP!
Panel 5. Medium panel. Jen and Shesh both look mad at Theodore now, while Mike is weeping over his shame. Shesh and Theodore are arguing angrily; Theodore looks evil.
MIKE (pathetically, small balloon):

IT WAS JUST A PHASE…!
SHESH:

I THOUGHT YOU SAID IT WASN'T THE PLAYERS V.S. THE G.M.!
THEODORE:

MWA HA HA! YOU ASKED FOR IT AND I BROUGHT IT! I BROUGHT IT, PUT IT ON THE TABLE AND OPENED IT! AND NOW YOU'LL PLAY TO THE BITTER END!