Modern Business Writing

Example:

Corporate Secretarial Services cc

P O Box 789

Pretoria

0001
6 October 2009
The Manager

Progressive Office Automation (Pty) Ltd

2 Bloukranz Street

Highveld Ext 2

Centurion

0157
Dear Sir/Madam

CATALOGUE
With reference to your advertisement in yesterday’s (5 October) Pretoria News, could you please send me a copy of your photocopier catalogue.
I would also like to know if it is possible to lease your equipment instead of outright purchase.
Yours faithfully

(Signature)

Moeketsi Tshabalala

Administrative Manager

5.2.2.3 Responding to an enquiry/request for information

It is very important to make a good impression when responding to enquiries from potential customers. Of course, the best impression will be made by providing the materials or information that the perspective client has asked for. This positive impression will be improved by a well written response.

Remember to place your or your company's address at the top of the letter (or use your company's letterhead) followed by the address of the company you are writing to. You can also include a reference number for correspondence.

Important Language to Remember

• 
  The Start:
  

Dear Mr, Ms. Use Ms for women unless asked or indicated to use Mrs or Miss)

• 
  Thanking the Potential Customer for His/Her Interest:
  

Thank you for your letter of ... enquiring (asking for information) about ...
We would like to thank you for your letter of ... enquiring (asking for information) about ...

• 
  Providing Requested Materials:
  

We are pleased to enclose ...
Enclosed you will find ...
We enclose ...

• 
  Providing Additional Information:
  

We would also like to inform you ...
Regarding your question about ...
In answer to your question (enquiry) about ...

• 
  Closing a Letter Hoping for Future Business:
  

We look forward to ... hearing from you / receiving your order / welcoming you as our client (guest).

• 
  Signature:
  

Yours sincerely (remember use 'Yours faithfully' when you don't know the name of the person you are writing and 'Yours sincerely' when you do.
Exercise
Write a letter in response to a customer enquiring about a product/service that your firm supplies, using the above outline as a guide.

5.2.2.4 Claim letter
The following letter makes claims against unsatisfactory work.

Useful Key Phrases

• 
  As someone who has worked with ...
  
• 
  we were very disappointed to find / see / have discovered ...
  
• 
  As our written agreement stipulated, we expected ...
  
• 
  I think you will agree that a communication problem exists.
  
• 
  We would like you to ..., or provide us with a refund.
  

Corporate Secretarial Services cc

P O Box 789

Pretoria

0001
26 October 2009
Ms Zanele Moloi

Manager

Progressive Office Automation (Pty) Ltd

2 Bloukranz Street

Highveld Ext 2

Centurion

0157
Dear Ms Moloi
Tishimolto M 580 photocopier

As someone who has been using Tishimolto photocopying equipment for over 3 years, I am very disappointed with the quality of the copies I have been obtaining from the new machine.

As our written agreement stipulated, we required the machine to copy full colour documents. Instead, the only output we could achieve so far was black and white reproduction. I think you will agree that this is a serious shortcoming.

You must please deliver a photocopier capable of reproducing both black and white and colour, or cancel the lease.

Yours sincerely

(Signature here)

Tanya Ndou (Mrs)

Office Manager

5.2.2.5 Claim adjustment letter
The following letter adjust claims against unsatisfactory work or service.

Useful Key Phrases

• 
  I was very disappointed to read your letter of ... dealing with ...
  
• 
  As someone who values your business, I have already ...
  
• 
  Also, we will deduct another X percent of the bill for the misunderstanding.
  
• 
  Thank you for your patience.
  

Progressive Office Automation (Pty) Ltd

2 Bloukranz Street

Highveld Ext 2

Centurion

0157

30 October 2009
Mrs Tanya Ndou

Office Manager

Corporate Secretarial Services cc

P O Box 789

Pretoria

0001
Dear Mrs Ndou

Tishimolto M 580 photocopier

I was very concerned to read your letter of 26 October 2009 dealing with the issue of your newly acquired printer not being able to reproduce documents in colour. As someone who values your business,

I have given our technician, Thabo Mabuzo, instructions to come and investigate the problem as the equipment in question is definitely capable of printing in colour.

In the meantime you can make use of our equipment to print your documents. We will come and collect and deliver your copying work. Also, we will reduce your October lease bill by10 percent for the inconvenience you have suffered.

Thank you for your patience.

Yours sincerely,

(Signature here)

Ms Zanele Moloi

Manager
5.2.2.6 Regret letter
Exercise: Compose a letter to inform a candidate that (s)he has not been successful in her/his job application.

5.2.3 Answering complaints and enquiries
Welcome the letter of complaint. It gives you one of your best opportunities to improve your organisation’s goodwill. To take advantage of the opportunity, your attitude must be positive and helpful – not miserable or grudging.
Every complaint is important to the person who makes it, so don’t be offhand. Answer promptly and show that you are trying to be fair. Don’t argue or criticise; don’t antagonise with such phrases as ”you claim” or “you state”.
5.2.3.1 If you are in the wrong
Take the attitude that the reader is trying to help you. Don’t run your own organisation down by writing about “poor results” or “failures”, or remind the reader that the incident is “unfortunate” or that he/she has “complained”.
Acknowledge frankly that you are at fault, and apologise for any trouble that your reader has suffered (but if you suspect a law suit may result: beware).
Explain the cause of the trouble as honestly as you can; then state what you are doing to put matters right, and try to build goodwill.
5.2.3.2 If you are in the right – but will give way
Don’t try to make the correspondent feel small. Aim to get the maximum goodwill out of the situation.

Thank the reader for writing and sympathise. Then say what you are going to do: don’t sound grudging! Finally, suggest how similar trouble can be avoided in the future – be constructive, not critical of the past.

5.2.3.3 If you are in the right – and cannot give way
A difficult letter to write. Your aim is not only to save your organisation money; it is also to keep goodwill.

Try to educate the reader to use your product. Begin by getting on to some common ground, agree with something in the letter, thank them for writing and sympathise. Then state your point of view, and either say that you cannot accept responsibility or say w hat you can do to help; try to convince them that you are being fair. Suggest how similar trouble could be avoided in the future. Finally, regain their confidence in your organisation.

5.2.4 Structure for answering complaint letters
Case A: Company is wrong

1. 
   Thank you for your letter
   
2. 
   Say I am sorry, etc.
   
3. 
   Explain what happened
   
4. 
   Say what you will do about it (now and in the future)
   

Case B: Company is right, but will do something

5. 
   Thank you for your letter
   
6. 
   Sympathise – I am concerned
   
7. 
   Say what you are prepared to do for them
   
8. 
   How to prevent the same occurrence in the future
   

Case C: Company is right, and cannot do anything

1. 
   Thank you for your letter
   
2. 
   Sympathise with their problem
   
3. 
   I can understand your point
   
4. 
   But this is our point
   
5. 
   Because of our point I am sorry that we cannot help
   
6. 
   Advice for the future
   

Remember: Our sympathy and concern will show that we care about our reader.

Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we did not. Erica Jong