The Life and Times of

Kill ‘Em With Kindness or Murder in the Military 1 Samuel 18:13-30

13 Therefore Saul removed him from his presence, and appointed him as his commander of a thousand; and he went out and came in before the people. 14 And David was prospering in all his ways for the LORD was with him. 15 When Saul saw that he was prospering greatly, he dreaded him. 16 But all Israel and Judah loved David, and he went out and came in before them. 17 Then Saul said to David, “Here is my older daughter Merab; I will give her to you as a wife, only be a valiant man for me and fight the LORD'S battles.” For Saul thought, “My hand shall not be against him, but let the hand of the Philistines be against him.” 18 But David said to Saul, “Who am I, and what is my life or my father's family in Israel, that I should be the king's son-in-law?” 19 So it came about at the time when Merab, Saul's daughter, should have been given to David, that she was given to Adriel the Meholathite for a wife. 20 Now Michal, Saul's daughter, loved David. When they told Saul, the thing was agreeable to him. 21 And Saul thought, “I will give her to him that she may become a snare to him, and that the hand of the Philistines may be against him.” Therefore Saul said to David, “For a second time you may be my son-in-law today.” 22 Then Saul commanded his servants, “Speak to David secretly, saying, 'Behold, the king delights in you, and all his servants love you; now therefore, become the king's son-in-law.'“ 23 So Saul's servants spoke these words to David. But David said, “Is it trivial in your sight to become the king's son-in-law, since I am a poor man and lightly esteemed?” 24 And the servants of Saul reported to him according to these words which David spoke. 25 Saul then said, “Thus you shall say to David, 'The king does not desire any dowry except a hundred foreskins of the Philistines, to take vengeance on the king's enemies.'“ Now Saul planned to make David fall by the hand of the Philistines. 26 When his servants told David these words, it pleased David to become the king's son-in-law. Before the days had expired 27 David rose up and went, he and his men, and struck down two hundred men among the Philistines. Then David brought their foreskins, and they gave them in full number to the king, that he might become the king's son-in-law. So Saul gave him Michal his daughter for a wife. 28 When Saul saw and knew that the LORD was with David, and that Michal, Saul's daughter, loved him, 29 then Saul was even more afraid of David. Thus Saul was David's enemy continually. 30 Then the commanders of the Philistines went out to battle, and it happened as often as they went out, that David behaved himself more wisely than all the servants of Saul. So his name was highly esteemed.

The mere sight of David in his home infuriates Saul, but he cannot seem to kill him there either, so he attempts to get David out of sight by making him a commander of a thousand. It is difficult to see this as a demotion in the overall scheme of this chapter, though it could be. I am inclined instead to see this as an apparent promotion. Saul thereby appears to show kindness to David, while in reality he is seeking an occasion to be rid of him. If the Philistines or some other enemy does not kill David, at least he will be out of sight, and hopefully out of the Israelites’ minds. Again, it simply does not work that way. Wherever David is sent, God causes him to prosper so that his status with the people continues to be enhanced. All of this is observed by Saul, whose fear of David continues to grow.

Saul must think he is on the right track in seeking to have David killed at the hand of one of Israel’s enemies, but he needs to entice David to attempt a more dangerous mission which is more certain of being too much for him. So Saul offers his daughter Merab to David as his wife (verse 17). This is not a gift from Saul in response to David’s killing Goliath. It should be (17:25), but it is not. It is as though Saul has forgotten his promise. Saul makes this look like a new offer, and all David needs to do is “earn” Merab by being “a valiant man for Saul and fighting the Lord’s battles” (verse 17).

What pious-sounding words. Thankfully the text is not “scratch and sniff,” because the smell would not be pleasant. I am reminded of the country western song, “Workin’ like the devil, Servin’ the Lord.” Were we to write a song about Saul, it would be, “Talkin’ like the Lord, Servin’ the devil.” His words are indeed pious, but his intent is exceedingly evil. Saul offers his daughter to David with the hope that she will be the death of him as he seeks to earn her hand by accomplishing great military feats.

Saul certainly is not prepared for David’s response. David rejects Saul’s offer. It is not that David is reluctant to endanger himself in battle. This he does willingly, without expectations of rewards such as a wife from the daughters of Saul. David is a truly humble man who considers his station in life unworthy of such a gift, and so he declines. Due to his decline of Saul’s offer, Merab is given to another man as his wife. This is not the result of Saul’s change of mind or his broken promise (not that Saul is incapable of such things), but the text simply does not support such a conclusion. A time is set, a deadline is given, within which David must meet certain criteria (see verses 19, 26). Because David declines Saul’s offer, he does not meet the requirements within the set time, and thus Merab is given to Adriel (verse 19). This does not reflect negatively on Saul as much as it does positively on David.

Greatly disappointed, Saul is sure that if he can get David interested in one of his daughters, David will do something foolish enough to get himself killed in battle. How happy Saul is when he hears that his younger daughter Michal is madly in love with David. This is his second chance. Since Michal is more than willing to marry David, with a little encouragement David just might accept the offer this time. There is still hope of getting rid of David.

This time, Saul is much more thorough. He offers Michal to David and then instructs his servants to promote the idea with David so that he will accept the offer this time. His servants speak to David, telling him that the king really likes him, and that everyone wants him to become the king’s son-in-law. David responds as we should expect, by pointing out his humble standing in life and his inability to pay an appropriate dowry for such a noble woman. What he could afford to pay would be an insult to Michal and to Saul. Here is where Saul appeals to David: he does not want David’s money -- David can pay the dowry in different currency -- Philistine foreskins! Now this catches David’s interest. He wants Michal, and he is eager to do battle for the Lord, so he accepts the offer. Instead of getting himself killed, however, David fights the Philistines and presents the king with double the number of foreskins he requests.

Much to his distress, Saul now must give David his daughter’s hand in marriage. This represents more than just having his plans fail, again -- and even worse, David succeeds, again. Now Saul, who greatly fears David and wants him eliminated, has two of his own family members bound to David by love and a covenant. The chapter begins with the account of Jonathan’s love for David and his covenant with him. The chapter now ends with Michal’s love for David and her marriage covenant with him. Somehow David has managed to win over two members of Saul’s immediate family. Now, the very ones Saul assumed he could depend on to help him be rid of David are on David’s side. Saul, his plans, and his kingdom are falling apart.

The marriage Saul offers to David is designed as an incentive for David to engage in bold military actions, and so he does. The only problem is that these dangerous duties do not rid Saul of David; they only serve to elevate David above all of the other military commanders. David acts more wisely than all of them, and because of this, he is highly esteemed.