The Life and Times of


“My Three Sons. . . and Abner” (2-3)



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“My Three Sons. . . and Abner” (2-3)


This message is by no means an exposition of these two chapters. I have one more sermon to try to put all the pieces of this passage together. Here, my goal is to focus on a very few incidents in which Joab and Abner confront one another. I will try to concentrate on the events leading up to the war between the men of Judah and the men of Israel, and the consequences of that conflict.

David seeks divine guidance and is divinely directed to go up to the city of Hebron. After David, his wives, and the rest of his followers arrive at Hebron with their families, the men of Judah anoint David as their king, the king of Judah (2:1-4a). David’s graciousness toward the men of Jabesh-gilead (2:4b-7) gives the people of Israel an excellent opportunity to make David their king as well. It seems from Abner’s words in 3:17-19 that the men of Israel not only know David has been designated as Saul’s replacement, but that they want this. The problem is Abner. This cousin of Saul opposes David’s reign in Saul’s place and orchestrates events so that Ish-bosheth, a surviving son of Saul, becomes king over the rest of Israel. This delays David’s reign over all Israel for several more years (2:8-11).

Gangs are one of the major problems in our cities today. Gangs offer a sense of identity and belonging, a kind of fellowship, and a distorted, rather false, sense of security. Drive-by shootings are becoming more and more frequent, and when they occur, one of the first thoughts is that there may be some kind of gang connection. When the member of one gang is killed by a member of the other, more bloodshed is sure to follow in retaliation. A gang will kill the member of another gang just to increase the “status” of their gang (“We’re so tough we can kill anyone we want, any time we want!”). Gangs do not make sense to us, but to those who think as gang members do, it all seems very logical, if not right.

We think gangs are a twentieth century phenomenon. Yet when we read of this “contest” between 12 members of the servants of Ish-bosheth and 12 members of the servants of David, we look upon this as some kind of ancient tribal dispute, quite unrelated to our times. I suggest there is very little difference between the gang disputes of our day and the “contest” we read about in 2 Samuel 2:12-17. Tribal rivalry and gang rivalry are almost the same thing.

Think about this ancient contest in twentieth century terms for a moment. The two gangs are the Benjies and the Judes. Their leaders are Abner (Benjamites/Israelites) and Joab (Judah). Word is circulated that there will be a rumble between these two rival gangs. A place and a time to meet are set. The Benjies sit in one place, the Judes in another, facing each other. Abner and Joab begin to flex their muscles and put down their opponent. Finally, they agree there should be a contest, which will show the best gang. Twelve fighters are selected to represent each side. The side that wins has the best gang. The problem is that the men on each side are intent on killing their opponent, so when the contest begins, each man grabs his opponent by the hair and thrust’s his switch blade into his chest. All 24 men die, which immediately leads to all out fighting between the two sides, so that many others die in the conflict.

The contest is needless and fruitless. It can accomplish nothing more than intensifying the already existing sense of rivalry and competition between the tribe of Judah and the other tribes of Israel, especially that of Benjamin (the tribe of Abner, Saul, and Ish-bosheth). While Joab is quick to accept the challenge, it is Abner who seems to orchestrate this ill-fated event (is this his purpose?). Had one side won the contest, it would only make the other side more eager for another contest to save face by winning it. The result of the contest is a momentary victory for David's servants and an initial loss for the servants of Ish-bosheth. The latter are able to regroup, however, and to continue carrying on a war with the servants of David (see 2:25; 3:1, 6).

The contest that goes sour has more personal consequences for Joab. In the initial rout, Joab's men prevail over the servants of Abner and Ish-bosheth. Abner retreats, along with his men, and Asahel is in hot pursuit. Asahel seems to be the youngest brother of the three sons, intent on overcoming Abner. He is right behind Abner, who confirms Asahel is indeed hot on his heels. Is this Asahel's opportunity to prove himself a man, a worthy fighter like his two older brothers? It could be so. Abner knows it is either Asahel or himself. He urges Asahel to back off and pursue some other Israelite warrior, if need be. He seems to know that the only other way to stop Asahel is to kill him, and this he is more than able to do. He is not willing to do so, because he knows he will then have to face Joab, his older brother (not to mention Abishai). When Asahel refuses to give up his pursuit, Abner runs him through, not with the point of his spear but with the butt of his spear. This must take incredible strength and ability, and Abner is fully up to it, as he seems to know.

Joab and his older brother, Abishai, are not about to let the death of their brother pass without what they consider the only appropriate response -- killing Abner, who kill Asahel. If they kill Abner in the context of war, it will not be viewed as a murder but a necessary part of war (see 3:28-34; 1 Kings 2:30-33). The problem seems to be that while there is an initial victory for the men of Judah, the servants of David, Abner, and his men are able to reconnoiter, and in a position to be able to successfully defend themselves from atop a hill (2 Samuel 2:25). When Abner recommends that they call a cease fire, Joab agrees, stating that it is inevitable anyway (2:26-28).

There is still a state of war between the men of Judah and the other Israelites (3:1). If Joab or Abishai can get their hands on Abner, they can legitimately kill him. What Joab does not realize is that his opportunity to legitimately kill Abner is about to end. Abner has been taking advantage of the state of war between Israel and Judah (3:6). One can see how this could be true for the commander of the army of Israel. It has been true throughout history that some wars are prompted, or prolonged, because of those who profit from them. Two things happen in chapter 3 that cause Abner to change not only his mind, but his allegiance.

First, while Abner's strength within Israel is growing, the house of Saul is losing ground to the house of David. Abner is gaining a bigger piece of the pie, but the pie itself is shrinking. Second, Abner has become bold in his actions, taking Rizpah, one of Saul's concubines, for himself. This is not a simple act of love or passion, nor even an attempt at marriage. It is a symbolic act, which publicly declares Abner's right to rule in Saul's place (see 2 Samuel 16:20-23; 1 Kings 2:19-25). Abner personally installs Ish-bosheth as king, and it now appears intends to brush aside all pretense and become king himself. Ish-bosheth is distressed by Abner's actions and asks for an explanation. Abner is furious. How dare Ish-bosheth, Abner's puppet-king, question Abner's actions. Abner reminds Ish-bosheth that he has made him king and has protected him from David. How can Ish-bosheth dare question anything Abner does? Ish-bosheth keeps quiet, because he knows enough to be afraid of this man. For all intents and purposes, Abner is now in control in Israel.

What has been a true but unstated fact of life is now crystal clear: Abner is in control, not Ish-bosheth. This abdication of Ish-bosheth is just what Abner has been waiting for. Now he can negotiate an agreement with David, one that will allow him a bigger piece of an ever-growing pie. Abner is about to change sides. He knows it is God's will for David to reign as king over all Israel. He knows it is inevitable. But he is the one who will be the kingmaker; he is about to make it happen. And so Abner approaches David with the offer to make him king over all Israel. With one condition, David accepts Abner's offer (3:13). Abner then goes to the leaders of both sides and negotiates an agreement. David, it seems, is about to become king of all Israel at last.

I must pause to smile at Abner's offer to make David king because it reminds me of something which happened to me a few months ago. I was trying to repair the muffler on my daughter’s car and decided the best way to fix it was to weld the muffler to the exhaust pipe. The problem was that I did not have the right kind of gas welding rod. I knew a local welder who would probably know what I needed and could sell me the small amount of rod required. But his business was closed for the day. On the way home, I passed by a muffler shop that was open. In addition to fixing mufflers, this business also repaired transmissions. I went into the waiting area, where several customers were doing just that. I did not see anyone at work. I went out to the shop area, and this fellow told me I was in the “transmission repair” area, and that I would need to go to the other side of the building to the “muffler repair” area. I did so and found no one there to help me. Eventually, a man came from the back, dressed in clothing that led me to believe he worked there. Going over to him, I told him I was doing a small repair job and needed a short length of gas welding rod to be used on an exhaust system. Bending down, he picked up a short piece of rod that had been left lying on the floor. “Is this what you need?”, he asked. “Yes,” I replied, “how much do I owe you for it?” “I don’t know,” he said, “why don’t you just take it; I don’t work here anyway.”

Eventually I ended up going into the executive offices, where I negotiated a $1 price and left, my conscience intact. The point of this story is that a man offered to give me something that wasn’t really his in the first place. Here in our text Abner “gives” the kingdom of Israel to Ish-bosheth, one of Saul’s surviving sons. It is not really his to give, and it is David who is to be the king, not Ish-bosheth. Then, to make matters worse, when a rift occurs between Abner and Ish-bosheth, Abner offers to “give” the kingship over to David. Once again, it is not his to give. Abner reminds me a bit of Satan, who offers to “give” our Lord His kingdom (see Matthew 4:1-11; Luke 4:1-12).

Imagine Joab's amazement and distress when he returns from a raid17 only to be told that David has just entertained Abner and his delegation, and that they have been allowed to leave in peace (3:22-23). While Joab is out making war, David has been at home, making peace. I take it that this twice-found expression “in peace” is employed to indicate that the war is over.

This is not good news for Joab or for his brother, Abishai. The war is not over for them until Abner is dead. Joab virtually rebukes David for letting Abner go, insisting that his intentions cannot be noble (3:24-25). Apparently, Joab's words do not find a ready listener in David, who allows his decision to stand. It is hopeless for Joab to change David's mind. So, instead, Joab secretly orders some of his trusted messengers to bring Abner back to Hebron, under some pretense it seems. Then, when Joab is able to get Abner in private, he kills him (3:27). Since this is now officially a time of peace, and not war, the killing of Abner is murder. David is quick to indicate that he has had no part in it, and that he does not approve of it (3:28ff.).


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