Act naturally



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WALTZING Mrs. THATCHER
Once an ageing yuppie passed by a juicy pension fund,

Under the protection of a loophole in the law.

And he watched, and he waited and he seized the opportunity,

Then he banked it in the Seychelles before anybody saw.


Rip off the punters rip off the punters,

Tax the buggers heavily come listen to my plea.

'Cause my cottage needs rethatchering and my Rolls Royce needs an overhaul,

The plebs'll only spend it so give it all to me.


Then this poor old yuppie found life getting sticky

Folks were asking questions especially of him

So he sailed off in his yacht to the sunny Costa Packet

And no one’s ever seen him since he went for a swim


Rip off the punters rip off the punters,

Tax the buggers heavily come listen to my plea.

'Cause my cottage needs rethatchering and my Rolls Royce needs an overhaul,

The plebs'll only spend it so give it all to me.


THE WANDERER
Well I'm the type of guy who will never settle down

Where pretty girls are, well you know that I'm around

I kiss 'em and I love 'em, 'cause to me they're all the same

I hug 'em and I squeeze 'em they don't even know my name

They call me the wanderer, yeah the wanderer,

I roam around, around around, around around


Well there is Bo on my left hand and there is Mary on my right

And Jenny is the girl that I'll be with tonight

And when she asked me which one I love the best

I tear off my shirt and show her Rosy on my chest

'Cause I'm a wanderer, yeah the wanderer,

I roam around, around around, around around


Well, I roam from town to town,

I roam through life without a care,

And I’m as happy as a clown.

With my two fists of iron

And I'm going nowhere

Yeah, I'm the type of guy that likes to roam around

I'm never in one place I roam from town to town

And when I find myself falling for some girl

I hop right into that car of mine and I drive around the world

Yeah, I'm the wanderer, yeah the wanderer,

I roam around, around around, around around
Well, I roam from town to town,

I roam through life without a care,

And I’m as happy as a clown.

With my two fists of iron

And I'm going nowhere
Yeah, I'm the type of guy that likes to roam around

I'm never in one place I roam from town to town

And when I find myself falling for some girl

I hop right into that car of mine and I drive around the world

Yeah, I'm the wanderer, yeah the wanderer,

I roam around, around around, around around


WATERS OF TYNE
I canna get to my love though I would dae

The waters of Tyne come between her and me

So here I must stand with a tear in my eye

Both sighing and longing my true love to see


Go fetch me a boatman my bonny Jimmy

Find me a boatman and bring him to me

To carry me over the Tyne to my hinnie

And I shall remember the boatman and thee


Oh where is that boatman my bonny Jimmy

Fetch me the ferryman where’er he may be

That I may cross over the Tyne to my hinnie

So me and my love united may be


I canna get to my love though I would dae

The waters of Tyne come between her and me

So here I must stand with a tear in my eye

Both sighing and longing my true love to see



WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS
I’ve paid my dues time after time

I’ve done my sentence but comitted no crime

And bad mistakes I’ve made a few

I’ve had my share of sand kicked in my face but I’ve come through


We are the champions my friends

And we’ll keep on fighting ‘till the end

We are the champions we are the champions

No time for losers ‘cause we are the champions of the world


I’ve taken my bows and my curtain calls

You brought me fame and fortune and everything that goes with it I thank you all

But it’s been no bed of roses no pleasure cruise

I consider it a challenge before the whole human race and I ain’t gonna lose


We are the champions my friends

And we’ll keep on fighting ‘till the end

We are the champions we are the champions

No time for losers ‘cause we are the champions of the world


We are the champions my friends

And we’ll keep on fighting ‘till the end

We are the champions we are the champions

No time for losers ‘cause we are the champions of the world


WE CAN SWING TOGETHER
No one came to criticise no one to complain

Just to pass a little bit of time and play some human games

Some were smoking rolly rolls while others they had none

But everybody was holding hands and singing this little song


We can swing together, ‘cause we feel we’re doing it right

We can swing together, we can swing right through the night


Then when things were happening around about ten to four

There was a screeching of brakes, and dogs barking outside, and a hammering on the door

Then the voice of officialdom saying open up in the name of the law

We just kept on holding hands and singing this song some more


We can swing together, ‘cause we feel we’re doing it right

We can swing together, we can swing all through the night


Then they broke down all the doors, they kicked the windows in

Let their doggies off their leads and they ransacked everything

They stood us all against the wall their faces split with grins

We linked each other’s handcuffs and merrily began to sing


We can swing together, ‘cause we feel we’re doing it right

We can swing together, we can swing right through the night


They took us to see the county judge with a wig hat on his head

He heard our case with a smile on his face and this is what he said

I have to send you all to jail for doing this terrible thing

But as I walked down to the cells I swear I heard him sing


We can swing together, ‘cause we feel we’re doing it right

We can swing together, we can swing all through the night


We can swing together, ‘cause we feel we’re doing it right

We can swing together, we can swing all through the night


We can swing together, ‘cause we feel we’re doing it right

We can swing together, we can swing right through the night


WE USED TO KNOW
Whenever I get to feel this way

Hard to find new words to say

I think about the bad old days

We used to know


Nights of winter turn me cold

Fears of dying getting old

We ran the race the race was won

By running slowly


Could be soon we’ll cease to sound

Slowly upstairs faster down

Then to revisit stony grounds

We used to know


Remembering mornings shillings spent

Made no sense to leave the bed

The bad old days they came and went

You’ve been waiting fruitful years


Saving up the birds in hand

While in the bush the others land

Take what we can before the man

Says it’s time to go


Each to his own way I’ll go mine

Best of luck with what you find

But for your own sake remember times

We used to know



WEE WEE SONG
When I was a wee wee tot

They took me from my wee wee cot

And put me on my wee wee pot

To see if I’d wee wee or not


When they saw that I would not

They took me from my wee wee pot

And put me in my wee wee cot

And there I would wee wee or not



THE WEIGHT
We pulled into Nazareth, feeling 'bout half past dead

Just need to find a place, where we can lay our heads

Mister can you tell us, where a man might find a bed

He just grinned and shook our hands, "No" was all he said


Take a load off Fanny take a load for free

Take a load off Fanny and you put the load right on me


I picked my bags and went looking for a place to hide

When I saw old Carmen and the devil walking side by side

Now I said, "Hey Carmen, come on let's go downtown !"

She said, "I got to go, but my friend can stick around."


Take a load off Fanny take a load for free

Take a load off Fanny and you put the load right on me


Go down miss Moses, there's nothing that you can say

'Cause it's old Luke and Luke's a-waiting on judgement day

"Hey Luke, my friend, what about young Anna Lee"

He said, "Do me a favour son, won't you stay and keep Anna Lee company"


Take a load off Fanny take a load for free

Take a load off Fanny and you put the load right on me


Crazy Chester followed me and he caught me in the fog

He said, "I will fix your rack, if you just jack my dog."

I said, "Wait a minute Chester, I'm a peaceful man."

He said, "That's OK, won't you feed him, whenever you can."


Take a load off Fanny take a load for free

Take a load off Fanny and you put the load right on me


Catch a cannonball, take me on down the line

My bag is sinking low and I do believe that it's time

To get back to Miss Fanny, you know she's the only one

She sent me here her regards for everyone


Take a load off Fanny take a load for free

Take a load off Fanny and you put the load right on me



WHAT'D I SAY
Hey mamma don't you treat me wrong

Come and love your daddy all night long

All night long hey hey all right
See that girl with the diamond ring

She sure knows how to shake that thing

All night long hey hey all right
Tell your papa tell your mam

I'm gonna send you back where you come from

You don't do right you don't do right hey hey
When you see me in misery

Come on baby set me free now

All night long hey hey all right
When you see me in misery

Come on baby set me free now

All night long hey hey all right
See the girl with the red dress on

She likes to rock and roll all night long

What'd I say yeah what'd I say
Well tell me what I say

Tell me what I say right now

Tell me what I say tell me what I say
Yeah I want to know

I want to know right now

Yeah tell me what I say
Baby feels so good

Baby you’re so good

Makes me feel all right
Shake that thing

Why don't you shake that thing right now

Yeah it'll make you feel all right
One more time

Yeah one more time right now

It's all right it's all right now

WHEN A MAN LOVES A WOMAN
When a man loves a woman

Can't keep his mind on nothing else

He'll change the world

For the good thing he's found

If she's bad he can't see it

She can do no wrong

Turn his back on his best friend

If he puts her down


When a man loves a woman

Spends his very last dime

Trying to hold on

To what he needs

He'll give up all of his comforts

Sleep out in the rain

He'll pretend it's the way

It ought to be


When a man loves a woman

I gave you everything I had

Trying to hold on to your love

Baby please don't treat me bad


When a man loves a woman

Down deep in his soul

She can burn him

So easily

If she plays him for a fool

He's the last one to know

Loving eyes

Can never see


When a man loves a woman

He can do her no wrong

He can never walk some other girl

Yes when a man loves a woman

I know exactly how he feels

Baby baby baby you're my world

When a man loves a woman

I know exactly how you feel



WHEN I’M DEAD AND GONE
Oh I love you baby I love you night and day

When I leave you baby don’t cry the night away

When I die don’t you write no words upon my tomb

I don’t believe I want to leave no epitaph of doom


Oh, oh, oh, oh, when I’m dead and gone

I want to leave same happy woman living on

Oh, oh, oh, oh, don’t want nobody to mourn beside my grave
Old mamma Linda she’s out to get my hide

She’s got a shotgun and her daughter by her side

Hey there ladies, Johnson’s free

Who’s got the love who’s got the love to keep a man like me


Oh, oh, oh, oh, when I’m dead and gone

I want to leave same happy woman living on

Oh, oh, oh, oh, don’t want nobody to mourn beside my grave
WHEN I'M SIXTY-FOUR
When I get older, losing my hair, many years from now

Will you still be sending me a valentine

Birthday greetings, bottle of wine

If I'd been out 'til quarter to three, would you lock the door

Will you still need me, will you still feed me

When I'm sixty-four


Hm

You'll be older too

And if you say the word

I could stay with you


I could be handy mending a fuse when your lights have gone

You can knit a sweater by the fireside

Sunday mornings go for a ride

Doing the garden, digging the weeds, who could ask for more

Will you still need me, will you still feed me

When I'm sixty-four


Every summer we can rent a cottage

On the Isle of Wight if it's not too dear

We could scrimp and save

And grandchildren on your knee

Vera, Chuck and Dave
Send me a postcard, drop me a line, stating point of view

Indicate precisely what you mean to say

Yours sincerely wasting away

Give me your answer, fill in a form, mine forever more

Will you still need me, will you still feed me

When I'm sixty-four


Will you still need me, will you still feed me

When I'm sixty-four


WHEN YOU’RE DOWN AND OUT
Once I lived the life of a millionaire

Spent all my money just did not care

Took all my friends out for a mighty good time

Bought bootleg whisky, champagne and wine


Then I began to fall so low

Lost all my good friends just had nowhere to go

If I get my hands on a dollar again

I’m gonna hang on it ‘till that eagle grins


Nobody wants you

When you’re down and out

In your pocket not one penny

And your friends well you don’t have any


When you get back on your feet again

Everybody wants to be your long lost friend

Mighty strange without a doubt

Nobody wants you when you’re down and out


WHILE MY GUITAR GENTLY WEEPS
I look at you all see the love there that’s sleeping

While my guitar gently weeps

I look at the floor and I see it needs sweeping

Still my guitar gently weeps


I don’t know why nobody told you

How to unfold your love

I don’t know how someone controlled you

They bought and sold you


I look at the world and I notice it’s turning

While my guitar gently weeps

With every mistake we must surely be learning

Still my guitar gently weeps


I don’t know how you were diverted

You were perverted too

I don’t know how you were inverted

No one altered you


I look at you all see the love there that’s sleeping

While my guitar gently weeps

I look at you all still my guitar gently weeps

WHINNY’S RAG
Listen while I tell you about a little girl

I’ve been with over just three years

Some would say she’s slow but I would answer no

She knows how to shift them gears


We used to be so cosy everything was rosy

In our little love nest on the Old Kent Road

In our house of passion they could hear us thrashing

A good six houses down the road


But now that she has gone I can’t carry on

Every night I end up canned

I’m in and out of boozers I’m backing all the losers

Well I have to take myself in hand


I was s’posed to meet her by a parking meter

It was just outside the Coal Face Club

Then when I had got there I looked but couldn’t find her

I thought she must be taking a walk


I there and then decided

As swiftly home I strided

I’d have to make her sorry for crossing my path
I was really mad completely off my mettle

I can’t believe she left me all alone

I went to see her mother she wasn’t with her brother

I began to leap and groan


Then in disillusion

I came to this conclusion

My little bird had flown
If you see my Whinny she’s blonde and rather skinny

But you’ll know her by the wart on her nose

Her dress is very sweet she’s really rather neat

She always wears them beat up clothes


So Whinny if you’re near

Come home to me my dear

You know I’ll always understand
WHISKY IN THE JAR
As I was going over the Cork and Kerry mountains

I met with captain Ferrel as his money he was counting

I first produced my pistol and then got out my rapier

Saying stand and deliver for I am the bold receiver


Put your ring on a do on a di

Wack for my daddy oh

Wack for my daddy oh

There's whisky in the jar


I took all of his money and it was a pretty penny

I put it in my bag and I took it home to Molly

She swore that she’d love me and she ne'er again would leave me

The devil take the women for you know she tricked me easy


Put your ring on a do on a di

Wack for my daddy oh

Wack for my daddy oh

There's whisky in the jar


Being drunk and weary I went into Molly’s chamber

Taking my bounty with me and I never knew the danger

For round about six or seven in walked captain Ferrel

I jumped up fired off my pistols and I shot him with both barrels


Put your ring on a do on a di

Wack for my daddy oh

Wack for my daddy oh

There's whisky in the jar


Now some they like the fishing and some they like the fowling

And some men like to hear the cannon balls rolling

Me I like sleeping specially in my Molly’s chamber

But here I am in prison here I am with a ball and chain yeah


Put your ring on a do on a di

Wack for my daddy oh

Wack for my daddy oh

There's whisky in the jar

If there's anyone can help me it's my brother in the army

Maybe he's in Cork or maybe in Killarney

Together we'll go tramping through the golden fields of barley

He's sure to treat me better than my darling sporting Jenny


Put your ring on a do on a di

Wack for my daddy oh

Wack for my daddy oh

There's whisky in the jar



WHITE ROOM
In a white room with black curtains in the station

Black roof country no gold pavements tired starlings

Silver horses ran down moonbeams in your dark eyes

Dawn light smiles on you leaving my contentment


I'll wait in this place where the sun never shines

Wait in this place where the shadows run from themselves


You said no strings could secure you at the station

Platform ticket restless diesel goodbye window

I walked out of such a sad time at the station

As I walked out felt my own need just beginning


And I'll wait in the queue wen the train comes back

Lie with you where the shadows run from themselves


At the party she was kindness in the hard crowd

Consolation for the old wound now forgotten

Yellow tigers crouched in jungles in her dark eyes

She's just dressing goodbye windows tired starlings


I'll sleep in this place with the lonely crowd

Lie in the dark where the shadows run from themselves



A WHITER SHADE OF PALE
We skipped the light Fandango

And turned cartwheels cross the floor

I was feeling kind of sea sick

But the crowd called out for more

The room was humming hotter

As the ceiling flew away

When we called out for another drink

The waiter brought a tray


And so it was later

As the mirror told his tale

That her face at first just ghostly

Turned a whiter shade of pale


She said there is no reason

And the truth is plain to see

As I wandered through my playing cards

That would not let her be

One of sixteen vestal virgins

Who were leaving for the coast

And the moment my eyes were open

They might just as well been closed


And so it was later

As the mirror told his tale

That her face at first just ghostly

Turned a whiter shade of pale


And so it was later

As the mirror told his tale

That her face at first just ghostly

Turned a whiter shade of pale


WHO'LL STOP THE RAIN
Long as I remember rain's been coming down

Clouds of mystery falling confusion on the ground

Goodness through the ages trying to find the sun

And I wonder still I wonder who'll stop the rain


I went down Virginia seeking shelter from the storm

Out up in the fable I watched the tower close

Obvious plans and new deals wrapped in golden chains

And I wonder still I wonder who'll stop the rain


Heard the singers playing how we cheered for more

Crowed rushed together trying to keep warm

Still the rain kept falling violence on my heels

And I wonder still I wonder who'll stop the rain



WHOLE LOTTA LOVE
You need coolin’ baby I’m not foolin’

I’m gonna say it yeah get back to schoolin’

Way down inside honey you need it

I’m gonna give you my love

I’m gonna give you my love
Wanna whole lotta love

Wanna whole lotta love

Wanna whole lotta love

Wanna whole lotta love


You’ve been learnin’ baby I mean learnin’

All them good times baby baby I’ve been yearnin’

Way way down inside honey you need it

I’m gonna give you my love

I’m gonna give you my love
Wanna whole lotta love

Wanna whole lotta love

Wanna whole lotta love

Wanna whole lotta love


You’ve been coolin’ baby I’ve been droolin’

All the good times I’ve been misusin’

Way way down inside I’m gonna give you my love

I’m gonna give you every inch of my love

Gonna give you my love
Wanna whole lotta love

Wanna whole lotta love

Wanna whole lotta love

Wanna whole lotta love


Way down inside woman you need love
Shake for me I wanna be your back door man

Hey oh hey oh oh oh oh

Keep a coolin’ baby keep a coolin’ baby
WHOLE LOTTA SHAKIN' GOING ON
Come on over baby whole lotta shaking going on

I said come on over baby baby you can't go wrong

We ain't thinking whole lotta shaking going on
Come on over baby we've got a chicken in the barn

Come on over baby we've got the bull by the horns

We ain't thinking whole lotta shaking going on
I said shake baby shake shake baby shake

Shake baby shake shake baby shake

Come on over whole lotta shaking going on
Come on over baby we've got a chicken in the barn

Come on over baby we've got the bull by the horns

We ain't thinking whole lotta shaking going on
I said shake baby shake shake baby shake

Shake baby shake shake baby shake

Come on over baby whole lotta shaking going on
I said shake baby shake shake baby shake

Shake baby shake shake baby shake

Come on over whole lotta shaking going on

Come on over whole lotta shaking going on




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