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1059

From: Elnora Van Winkle>

Date: Fri Jun 8, 2001 10:27am

Subject: Getting angry at the anger !!!
Everything I have read and put into practice has involved re-directing anger at past abusers (people).
I recently started directing anger at the symptoms themselves (i.e. depression, anxiety, etc) and found massive releases of anger followed. I went from hours of that drug like sleep and then when I woke up felt has though had just drink 15 pints of beer for the next 5 hours.
Because I have known I had emotional problems since a teenager, I have built up massive amounts of frustration and feelings of underachievement. It felt like been trapped in an emotional prison cell.
So by simply re-directing anger at this image of a prison cell and the other symptoms of repressed anger, I found has helped me a lot. P
Thanks for sharing this, and it sounds like a good idea to redirect to the symptom of depression or anger, even if you don't have past abusers in mind, since this will help the anger surface. It is sometimes difficult to get to the anger, but once you bring it up you are helping to reduce the toxicosis, clear pathways, and heal. Once you feel the anger you might then do some redirecting to past abusers who caused you to suppress anger. This was the cause of the symptoms in the first place.
Ellie

http://clearpathway.net/

http://www.geocities.com/HotSprings/Sauna/2579

http://homepages.nyu.edu/~er26

http://www.egroups.com/group/depression-cause-cure
1060

From: Elnora Van Winkle>

Date: Sat Jun 9, 2001 6:24am

Subject: Meditation
Meditation has always has a negative affect on me. I did Vipassana or Insight meditation for 10 years and it made me worse. I seemed to open the door to the repressed thoughts, fears, negative self-talk, while dropping all my defenses. I stopped meditating for about 5 years then went to TM, went through their training, and got my mantra. TM worked much better but I could not do the 20 minutes twice a day regimen.
That seemed to cause me problems. Probably was the hardened steel resistance my demons are made of. I use TM to calm me and quiet the thoughts at times. E
Hi,

The kind of meditation that brought up negative thoughts and feelings was probably healing, IF you knew to redirect anger when those emotions surfaced.


If you are using the RST, it's better not to use those long meditative techniques to calm your mind. Compulsive thinking is a detox crisis. Try to do some redirecting when your thoughts are compulsive. After you do some redirecting during a detox crisis, then you may find you briefly but naturally fall into a restful meditative state.
Ellie

http://clearpathway.net/

http://www.geocities.com/HotSprings/Sauna/2579

http://homepages.nyu.edu/~er26

http://www.egroups.com/group/depression-cause-cure
1061

From: Elnora Van Winkle>

Date: Mon Jun 11, 2001 7:27am

Subject: Relationships
If you are new to the RST it's best not to make changes in relationships at this time. When you recover you may find partners change even if they are not into the RST themselves.
Here is a post from Lynn who began the RST back in 1999.
A piece of good news on my side. My hubby is slowing getting used to the new state of our relationship - that is, without much conflict or clashes anymore, and no more uproar at all. Besides he's slowly detoxing, on the one side getting funny symptoms and aches of different kinds, and on the other side starting to think straight - his feelings towards children getting milder and tenderer than ever, with a strong tendency to forgive readily and open-mindedly, and less and less impulses to spank or impose his will by force - a lot less abuse of power or will to control others' behavior on the whole. Lynn
Ellie

http://clearpathway.net/

http://www.geocities.com/HotSprings/Sauna/2579

http://homepages.nyu.edu/~er26

http://www.egroups.com/group/depression-cause-cure
1062

From: Elnora Van Winkle>

Date: Tue Jun 12, 2001 2:56pm

Subject: A clear brain
Hi Ellie
Been a long time since I wrote anything, please don't think I have forgotten this forum and the good it did for me. I thought I would let you and others know how I'm getting on.
I began redirecting around 6-7 months ago now, it seems longer perhaps because my state before then was so different to the one I am in now. Depression is no longer an issue anymore, like everybody I have my low days but handling life has become far easier.
Redirecting has been by no means a cure for problems in life, it has allowed me to have the emotional stability to deal with problems and the anguish that these problems may cause. I have become a far more confident person and there is still work to be done on my confidence but 18 years of mental suppression and abuse takes it toll. Right now I feel like I am catching up on all the years I missed that were set aside for me to mature and grow mentally. Never before has my brain been clear enough to do this.
The one thing I must say is to all those who suffer with depression or whatever difficulty you are going through once you reach the other side you have a big advantage over so many. You will know how important it is to be content and happy and therefore if you're like me your priorities will change and the real things that matter come to the foreground, life becomes easier because the right things become important.
I wish the best of luck to all those going through the process right now, it aint easy but it is truly worth it. Like everything else in life the more you put in the more you will get out. Regards, P
Thanks for your encouragement to the group. You are right it's not easy. It's a lot of hard work, but worth it. Keep redirecting about the confidence. Sounds like some voices still in your head putting you down. I began the RST back in 1997 and I still need to redirect from time to time. Ellie
1063

From: Elnora Van Winkle>

Date: Thu Jun 14, 2001 9:50am

Subject: 11.Normalcy
11. Arthur Janov has a good description of normalcy.

Normalcy ultimately means freedom from emotional disorders, the basic addiction to people, i.e. codependency, and the overlying addictions to food, alcohol, drugs, sex, etc. Addictions will subside slowly through the muddy basin period.


The goal of primal therapy is to bring one to what Janov describes as post primal, ie normal. I don't find psychological theories useful, but I identify with his description of normalcy,
-On Being Normal, Chapter 11, The Primal Scream, Arthur Janov, Perigee Books, 1970. Hopefully I'm not in trouble because of copyright-- I think this book is out of print.
===============

===============



Archive note. The lengthy text in this message has been deleted, because it is a lengthy repeat of message #74. See message 74 for this text.

===============

===============
1064

From: Elnora Van Winkle>

Date: Fri Jun 15, 2001 11:26am

Subject: Anxiety and tapering off Xanex
Subject: Anxiety and tapering off Xanex
Elnora Van Winkle,
I have two questions.
I am on a low dose of Xanex but have been trying to taper off for the past month. The amount of anxiety and panic is very high now that I'm on half the original dose. (Original: .25mg twice a day. Current: .125mg twice a day.) Do you have any advice on this medication tapering topic. Most of my anxiety and stress is job related and I have been trying to make a downshift change to a job with less stress. But being 54 is now a big hurdle.
Another question is what type of therapists/therapy do you recommend for dealing with abandonment issues, fear, anxiety? E.
Hello,

I assume you are in the eGroup, depression-cause-cure. If so you are in the right place for redirecting self-therapy (RST) for anxiety and depression. This will cure you of abandonment issues, fear, and anxiety. Please study all the articles suggested on any of the websites below, and follow the suggestions in the Welcome Messages, and read the Archvives/Messages.


I would not make job changes if possible until you recover. Your anxiety is not specifically due to a stressful job. This may trigger your anxiety, but your symptoms are detox crises, and opportunities to do the redirecting.
Get into the RST and you will have less trouble going off the meds. As you taper off, do some redirecting before you take each dose. Then go ahead and take it. In time you will have less trouble going off it.

Ellie
http://clearpathway.net/

http://www.geocities.com/HotSprings/Sauna/2579

http://homepages.nyu.edu/~er26

http://www.egroups.com/group/depression-cause-cure
1065

From: Elnora Van Winkle>

Date: Fri Jun 15, 2001 11:34am

Subject: Concrete Results
>Hello ,
>Praise the Almighty, things are better than I can ever remember.
>I have been using RST for about three months. It has made me very optimistic. The first concrete results are here, and reading the posts on the website indicates the best is yet to come.
>I used to blow up about any little thing, always starting an argument if possible, always insulting whoever I could get away with. All gone now. Ask my wife. She hates to hear me shout and bang away at my mattress, but is slowly beginning to half admit that maybe it's a good thing. Only for me, of course.
>The thing was.... Constant battles with the wife. A distinct feeling: this ain't it. I picked up a book on primal therapy, but there are no practitioners of it here (which probably saved me thousands of dollars). So I searched the web for info on self primalling. I tried to do it faithfully every day for 6 months, but no dice.
>I had seen the famous RST page at the beginning of the 6 months, but ignored it. After I saw primalling is not for me, I tried RST. Lo and behold, everything happened just as described. Headaches. Nausea. Colds and coughs. Crazy mood swings. After three months, some sort of stability. Like I am able to actually work every day, something almost impossible before. It's still a battle, but I usually win.
>So that's where I am now. I feel like I discovered a new religion, which on the one hand makes me constantly wary.
>(As for) increased energy, effortless weight loss, higher IQ, etc? I'm still waiting for all that. Donald
Ellie

http://clearpathway.net/

http://www.geocities.com/HotSprings/Sauna/2579

http://homepages.nyu.edu/~er26

http://www.egroups.com/group/depression-cause-cure
1066

From: Elnora Van Winkle>

Date: Sat Jun 16, 2001 6:40am

Subject: Religions
I recently spoke to someone in a chat room who said they were a Christian councilor. When I explained about how re-directing anger help me, they said they had heard about anger re-directing but didn't use and didn't think it that important. They said that it can help in some cases but not all emotional problems are caused by repressed anger.
Surely don't you agree that any emotional trauma the key to healing is simply to release those emotions. So if you are abused as a child by your parents or experience some trauma as an adult, the damage is the emotions bottled up inside and not the event itself.
Anyway I eventually get her to say it was good when I started throwing those Bible quotes at her and stating I believed it was a technique used by Jesus. After all I do believe that the toxic mind theory after all is nothing new. It is simple a scientific explanation of a healing process used by Christ himself.
It is very frustrating to think there are many people out there like myself, who may never find healing because the people they will turn to won't understand how to heal them. P
Hello,

I agree with you. The toxic mind theory also explains how Buddha and Mohammad healed and I write about this in my book. I think those people you mention are still in denial and have to hit a bottom, i.e. find out those healers they turn to can't help them.


I think religions are groups of codependent people looking for answers, when the real answer is within. The RST will never be a religion. The people who recover will not need codependent groups, and will pass this on one to one.
Ellie

http://clearpathway.net/

http://www.geocities.com/HotSprings/Sauna/2579

http://homepages.nyu.edu/~er26



http://www.egroups.com/group/depression-cause-cure
1067

From: Elnora Van Winkle>

Date: Sat Jun 16, 2001 9:06am

Subject: Giving God the Credit
I myself am a born-again Christian and have suffered with depression and anxiety for years. Two months ago I got in touch with Christian counseling organization near me (nothing to do with the person I spoke to in the chat room). I knew I had a problem for years but never wanted to talk about my past to anyone. But now I decided I had had enough.
My first appointment was with the main counseling woman to just learn about my background and decide who I should speak to next. She asked me about my perception of GOD. After I explained that I saw GOD as a giant angry, hateful ogre who was totally unpleasable, she asked me about my parents. Straight away she said my problem was repressed anger and the healing would occur by finding ways to release this anger.
I asked how was this done and she explained, some techniques. She said one way is to imagine your parents in the room and you can be free to get angry with them by either shouting at them or punching some kind or pillow (As you already know about).
To be honest I thought this was some strange mind over matter technique and thought it wouldn't work so I didn't want to go back. I thought healing would involve just been prayed for and everything would just happen easily. But then three days later, I found your website and couldn't believe my eyes. A scientific explanation of the same thing. OK, GOD, I thought, this is the way to get healed, so I will do it.
It was at this time when I told another friend, who had a similar background to me. He just laughed it off though as a joke. When your scared of the truth, the easiest thing is to just laugh it off as a joke.
When I went for my first appointment with a councilor nearly two weeks later, I explained all about the toxic mind theory and how I had started to re-direct anger already. She agreed with what I was doing and even asked more questions then I was asking her the first week and said she would look into it herself. She even agreed that getting angry at the false image of GOD was perfectly sound.
Although, the healing as been virtually 100% through the self-help therapy, speaking to the councilor speeded up the process. Firstly, because she helped me to recognize other people who had hurt me when I didn't realize. I was then able to direct anger at them and speed the process up.
I agree with the following point you made:
"I think religions are groups of codependent people looking for answers, when the real answer is within"
As I explained, I am a born-again Christian (not a religious person; I believe in a real living spiritual relationship with GOD, not just following rules and traditions) and believe in Baptism of the Holy Spirit and all the spiritual gifts. And yes, the answer is within. I believe GOD lives in me and led to this point of healing. IT'S FAIR TO SAY YOU DON'T NEED GOD TO FIND EMOTIONAL HEALING, AFTER ALL, GODS LAWS APPLY TO ALL PEOPLE BUT HAVING GOD CERTAINLY SPEEDS UP THE PROCESS.
I'm not taking anything away from all the clever people who through years of research have scientifically proven this healing process. But it's only right that my final thankyou goes to GOD, the man who invented the process!!!!!!! I can't remember the exact scripture, but it goes something like, "Make no mistake, all good things come from the Lord". P
Yes, yes, let's give God the credit. I knew when the toxic mind theory came to me in a flash, that it was a gift from God. I then spent two years searching the scientific literature, and found no research that did not prove it. You would like the passage in the Bible, where one person out of ten who were healed gave credit to God, and Jesus said, "Where are the other nine?"
Ellie

http://clearpathway.net/

http://www.geocities.com/HotSprings/Sauna/2579

http://homepages.nyu.edu/~er26

http://www.egroups.com/group/depression-cause-cure
1068

From: Elnora Van Winkle>

Date: Sun Jun 17, 2001 7:22am

Subject: 8. Welcome Message
Welcome,

The redirecting self-therapy (RST) is about reducing the flood of anger in your brain, and it "Works If You Work It!" Be sure to print out this Welcome message and the Pamphlet on: http://www.geocities.com/HotSprings/Sauna/2579/pamphlet.html or on:



http://homepages.nyu.edu/~er26/pamphlet.html
Refer to these when you have questions. Also read all the articles on http://homepages.nyu.edu/~er26
Your journey may seem like a roller coaster ride because mood swings can intensify temporarily, but as long as you continue to redirect your anger, you will recover fully. You will find support in the Archives/Messages where people have shared their stories, asked questions, expressed doubts, and described their success with the RST. Be sure to read the most recent messages that have numerical numbers in their subject titles. These are important summaries which are repeated. I have dropped the post-flood analogy as it gave people the idea they could be completely cured in a few months. You can be relieved of depression in this time, but unless you have already let go of addictions, including the addiction to stimulatory and sedating foods, full recovery takes a good year or more. You can slowly let go of addictions as you use the RST.
A good beginning is to write about your childhood relationships and subsequent relationships with persons who were similar to your parents. This will give you a list of past abusers. Do not try to recall specific incidents of childhood abuse or re-experience early trauma without a therapist who understands your need to redirect anger.
If you are suicidal please seek professional help. I am not a medical doctor or therapist. I suggest having a medical check up before using the RST. Give your doctor the scientific paper and ask for support. Do not go off medication without medical supervision. Try not to do the redirecting in the presence of an abusive partner. It would be better not to make major changes in work or relationships while you are in recovery. If your partner is supportive, explain that you may temporarily over-react and misdirect anger to him or her.
The eGroup is not interactive, but I like to hear how you are progressing with the RST and am here to support you. Reply to any post and it will reach me. I sometimes post your messages to the group, so please omit any identifying information. If you do not want your message posted please write DO NOT POST. You will find answers to most questions in the articles, in the FAQ, and by reading the Archives/Messages. When I made this discovery and developed the RST, I had no guidance other than my understanding of the simple biological concepts as explained in The Biology of Emotions article, so I know you can do the same if you study the articles. If you still have questions please contact me. I am happy to hear how it is going and support you in your journey to emotional health.
***********************************************
Here are some ways to release anger while mentally redirecting to past abusers.
Write letters or email to past abusers, then tear up the letters or delete the email.
Pound on a bed with your fists and yell (muffle your voice if you have neighbors) Use a bataka bat or tennis racket to spare your fists.
Slam doors or cupboard doors
Yell, scream, shriek (into a pillow if necessary or in the shower)
Go to an airport & stand out near where the planes are revving their engines and getting ready to take off and yell there. No one can hear you, you won't even be able to hear yourself.
Go to a cemetery and pound on a grave
Bang on a tree
If you are in public redirect the anger to past abusers quietly in your mind. Throw a crumpled ball hard into a wastebasket if you are at work. Break a pencil in two. Jab a ballpoint pen through a piece of paper.
Mentally talk to past abusers, say to those parental voices still in your head, 'get out of my head.'
If you can't sleep or wake up with a scary dream, pound your fists on the bed and redirect anger to past abusers until you relax.
Play pinball (or if you can find it... there's another game at some arcades where these little guys pop up & you're supposed to whomp 'em with a mallet as fast as you can) Go bowling and visualize the pins as past abusers. Find games like these on the Internet, e.g. the Elfbowl game.
Weed the garden, the lawn, & anything else in sight
Stomp your feet when you walk
Take a pair of jeans, hold it by the ankles, and whack the hell out of your bed.
Tear up a phone book (put work gloves on first to avoid paper cuts) Yell while you tear, if you can. Tear the pages out, tear 'em in half, throw 'em all over the room when you're done.
Do a dance of anger
Throw things, not random things; safe things like pillows at the wall or bed.
Kick a ball around the room
Kick a rock down the street
Run, ride a bike, or do other hard physical exercise.
Scrub the floor.

*************************************************


Please save this Questionnaire, which is not a test, but is offered as a guide. The changes listed here become more and more pronounced, so if you keep track of the approximate dates when you notice these more and more, you will have an idea of your progress.
On what date did you begin the self-help measures.

Did you pound on a bed, or get physical in other ways, and redirect anger while thinking of past abusers once a day...three times a day...more often

If you could not get physical did you mentally redirect anger toward past abusers once a day........three times a day........more often

What was your pulse rate on awakening (average over several days) when you began

**********************************************

What is the approximate date when you noticed the following:


Anger when intense is easily redirected mentally toward past abusers.

Feel 'high' after releasing anger.

Have increased periods of depression after redirecting.

Have a heavy or drug-like sleep.

Often feel your heart pounding

More frequent headaches, sweating, or fever.

Pounded on the bed less often.

Mood swings less intense and less often.

Intense feelings of grief and crying.

If plans don't work out, can find something else to do.

Feel friendlier and more interested in people, even strangers.

Enjoy people but feel content alone.

Seldom feel guilty.

Seldom have resentments.

No longer think or act compulsively.

Feel sad, cry easily, but not depressed.

Work and study efficiently, concentration and memory good.

No longer feel driven to work or other activity.

Fall asleep more easily and no longer have a heavy drug-like sleep. Sleep is lighter but restful. Seldom have scary dreams.

Can stop thinking about something, i.e! . change the subject in your mind.

Can flash back to childhood events, even traumatic ones, without emotional pain.

Anger is not intense and is mostly about current situations.

Shoulders and posture are relaxed. Sometimes are clumsy.

No longer crave stimulants or junk food. You may still use these but find you don't get addicted.

Diet is mostly raw natural foods.

Seldom have a cold or other acute disorders.

Seldom feel your heart pounding.

Anxiety, fear, and depression are gone.

Stopped medication.

Stopped therapy.

On what date would you say you identified with-not all-but most of these.

Now what is your pulse on awakening (average over several days)


********************************************************
Please contact me when you identify with most of these characteristics, set your subscription to NoMail/WebOnly, and join the non-anonymous interactive eGroup (http://groups.yahoo.com/group/depression-conquered), which will be a place to make new friends, and to create a community of emotionally healthy people.
Please do not ask me to unsubscribe you, but go to

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/depression-cause-cure where you subscribed. This menu will also let you change your subscription between digest and normal mode or set to NoMail/WebOnly.


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